23 Signs That the Honeymoon Phase Has Come to an End

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When my partner, Jake, and I first started dating, we were the epitome of cuteness. We were inseparable, finding joy in even the simplest activities — grocery shopping, tackling bills side by side, and working out together. Our weekends were filled with city explorations, and our friends often joked about our sugary sweet behavior. Honestly, we were that couple everyone loved to tease.

Once we tied the knot, the honeymoon phase only intensified. We’d whip up gourmet dinners and unwind on our porch, dreaming about the pitter-patter of little feet in our newly furnished living room. Life was blissful, and we were still adorably in love.

Fast forward to the arrival of our first child, and while we tried to maintain the magic, reality hit hard. Let’s be real — there’s nothing romantic about pumping breast milk while your husband munches on breakfast. After a few years, it became evident that if we were committed for the long haul, I’d need to accept his less-than-pleasant bathroom habits, and he’d have to come to terms with the fact that seeing me in a sports bra isn’t exactly a turn-on.

Romance has taken on a new form after 17 years of marriage. Sure, we may not have candlelit dinners every night, but our bond is strong. I can binge-watch my favorite shows while he snores beside me like a freight train. So, if you’re wondering whether the honeymoon phase is behind you, here are some signs to consider:

1. The last time you celebrated New Year’s Eve together was during Y2K.
2. You’ve stopped trying to impress his mother.
3. Your Christmas tree is overflowing with gifts for yourself, including those cozy fleece leggings.
4. A new water heater feels like a romantic gesture just in time for Valentine’s Day.
5. You’re on a first-name basis with courtesy flushes.
6. You’ve gone to bed angry a handful of times since saying “I do.” Okay, let’s be honest — it’s been more like 562.
7. You no longer giggle when someone addresses you as “Mrs.”
8. You’ve contemplated hosting a “Replace the Broken Wedding Appliances” shower for your upcoming anniversary.
9. Forget the chocolates; you’re head over heels when he empties the dishwasher without a nudge.
10. “I’ll handle bedtime” is your version of foreplay.
11. You both roll your eyes at young couples making out in public.
12. You haven’t attended a wedding in over 15 years.
13. “Dinner and a movie” now translates to Netflix and takeout.
14. You buy your underwear in bulk from Costco and couldn’t care less.
15. Sweet love notes have been swapped for texts like “Bring home milk or don’t bother coming back.”
16. When you call someone “Pooh Bear,” it’s referring to a stuffed animal.
17. He’s stopped joking about inviting extra guests to your bed.
18. “Clothing optional” days now only apply to your toddler.
19. You come back from your daily run with a single coffee from Starbucks.
20. He pretends not to notice when you change your hair or wardrobe.
21. He trims his nose hairs while you’re clipping your toenails, and you both find it completely normal.
22. You give him the side-eye when he attempts to join you in the shower — come on, it’s the only moment of peace I get!
23. Candles are only lit during power outages or when he’s turned the bathroom into a disaster zone.

I don’t crave grand romantic gestures like I used to in my twenties. Now, I’m thrilled when laundry makes it to the basket and dishes are actually loaded into the dishwasher. While I miss the occasional unexpected flowers, I prefer the honesty of our relationship. Jake has seen all my quirks — the good, the bad, and the downright ugly — yet he still looks at me with those bedroom eyes, even when I’m in those fuzzy leggings he gifted me last Christmas.

For more insights into navigating relationships, check out this other blog post at intracervicalinsemination.com/blog. And if you’re curious about home insemination, Make a Mom has excellent resources for that journey. Additionally, Rmany is a fantastic resource for pregnancy and related topics.

In summary, while the honeymoon phase may have faded, what remains is a deep connection built on authenticity and shared experiences.