5 Common Misconceptions About Parenting Older Kids

When it comes to parenting, much of the advice and content out there zeroes in on the early years. You know the drill: fruit snacks stuck to every surface, lost socks that seem to have a life of their own, and the impossibility of finding a moment alone in the bathroom. Let’s not forget the frantic late-night baking for school fundraisers that you remembered at the last minute.

And then there’s the seemingly endless cycle of whining, school lunches, and carpools. With the added chaos of after-school activities—soccer practices, music lessons, and school performances—it’s enough to push any parent to the brink of insanity. Been there, done that, and trust me, I have the battle scars to prove it.

But here’s a revelation: all those promises about how parenting gets easier as kids grow up? Complete nonsense. Sure, some kids transition from toddlers to adults, but many seem to have no interest in stepping into adulthood. Let’s debunk five common myths that I was fed while raising my children, all of which turned out to be totally false.

1. You’ll finally have time for yourself when they’re older.

What a joke! I still find myself juggling housework, cooking, and reminding my kids about their chores—all while putting in long hours at work. You would think a simple text would suffice to remind them that cleaning the toilet is non-negotiable, but no, they still clean like toddlers. The struggle is real, folks!

2. Once they can drive, they’ll beg to stay home.

Not in my house! I was itching to get behind the wheel at 16, but my kids act like they’re being sentenced to a life of hardship just to get a license. I often find myself concocting errands just to get some peace and quiet. If sending them to the store for a single can of peas nets me 15 minutes of silence, I’m all in for the extra can!

3. They won’t want to talk to you anymore.

False! I’m grateful my kids feel comfortable sharing their lives with me. However, could we please have these heart-to-heart conversations during daylight hours instead of at midnight when I have to get up at the crack of dawn? Also, the constant barrage of “Mom! Mom! Mom!” hasn’t faded one bit. It’s as if they can sense when I’m trying to focus on something else.

4. Their toys will vanish as they grow older.

Not a chance! While the toys have evolved from action figures to video game controllers, they are still everywhere—on the couch, floor, and even the dining table. Seriously, how hard is it to put things away? Apparently, it’s impossible.

5. Older kids can handle themselves.

In what universe? Sure, they can warm up leftovers if you remind them, and they might wash dishes under duress. But asking them to manage their own mornings or notice a messy house? Forget it! Despite all my efforts to teach them basic life skills, it seems they still need a nudge (or a shove) to do anything on their own.

In short, our responsibilities as parents don’t magically disappear just because society thinks older kids should be self-sufficient. The time and effort we invest in teaching them life skills don’t yield results as swiftly as they did for previous generations. However, I cherish the strong bond I have with my kids, which includes family movie nights and, deep down, I know they’ll always come home for the holidays, likely expecting me to whip up their favorite meals.

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Summary

Parenting older kids comes with its own set of challenges, and many common beliefs about these challenges are misleading. From time management to communication, the reality of raising older children often defies expectations. Embrace the journey and enjoy the relationships you build along the way.