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10 Regrets I Have About Life Before Kids
A year after tying the knot with my husband, we decided to ditch birth control and let life unfold. At the ages of 24 and 25, we felt ready to embrace parenthood, diving headfirst into the next chapter of our lives. While I wouldn’t trade my kids for anything, I sometimes wish I could give my younger self a little pep talk. If I had the chance to hit the rewind button, here’s what I would have done differently:
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Tackle My Student Loans
I graduated with a hefty student debt, and nearly two decades later, I’m still chipping away at it. In hindsight, I wish we’d delayed starting our family by a year or two, living on my husband’s salary while I focused my income on paying off those loans. -
Travel More
Okay, I know this one sounds like a cliché, but it’s spot on. I spent some time in Japan post-college, which was amazing, but I’d trade a few parenting years for more adventures, both solo and with my husband. With the tips I’ve picked up over the years, I could have made travel much more affordable back then. -
Pursue a Higher Degree
Many times, I’ve pondered whether I should have gone for a Master’s or even a Ph.D. Sure, some moms do it after having kids (kudos to them!), but juggling little ones made that impossible for me. Now that my kids are older, I find myself lacking the motivation to dive back into academia. -
Enjoy Museums at My Own Pace
We’ve spent countless hours at museums as a family, but it often feels like a sprint through highlights rather than a deep exploration. I’d love to go back and take my time, soaking in every exhibit without a little one tugging at my sleeve. -
Attend More Live Performances
I didn’t realize just how rare it would be to enjoy live theater until I found myself with small children. Whether it’s a concert, play, or poetry reading—these experiences are often disrupted or entirely out of the question when kids are involved. -
Savor a Full Night’s Sleep
No explanation needed here; it’s a universal truth that sleep changes drastically after kids. Even when I manage a solid night’s rest now, it’s never quite the same as those carefree pre-kid slumbers. -
Master Time Management
I seriously underestimated the significance of time management until I found myself juggling two jobs, a spouse, three kids, and community commitments. Now, I’m too swamped to explore time management strategies—talk about irony! -
Get Fit
I’ve always been somewhat of an on-again, off-again gym-goer, but if I could rewind, I’d have seized my youth and spare time to get into peak shape. Entering motherhood fit would have been a game-changer instead of trying to whip myself into shape at 40. -
Maintain a Diary
While I’ve started a few journals over the years, I wish I’d kept a more consistent record of my thoughts and experiences before kids. It would be fascinating to reflect on how I’ve changed (or stayed the same) since then. -
Cherish Alone Time
After getting married, my husband and I spent nearly every moment together before kids entered the picture. Since then, I’ve had a little one clinging to me, leaving little room for solitude. As an introvert, I now realize how precious that alone time was, and I wish I had appreciated it more.
I often wonder if I’d truly change anything if given a second chance. Hindsight is always 20/20, and we probably wouldn’t have had the budget for many of these experiences. However, it’s intriguing to consider what I might have done differently armed with the wisdom I have now.
As I look ahead to my 60s or 70s, I ponder what I’ll wish I had done while my kids were still at home. It’s a reminder to seize the moment now.
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Summary:
Reflecting on life before kids, I realize there are several things I wish I had done differently, such as paying off student loans, traveling more, pursuing higher education, savoring alone time, and appreciating the small joys of life. While I wouldn’t trade my children for anything, it’s fun to think about how I might have changed my journey with the knowledge I have now.