Dear America, can we please rethink the trend of giving our kids outlandish names? Seriously. Recently, it came to my attention that Olympic champion David Jacobs has named his newborn son “Boomer.” Now, “Boomer” might sound like a playful nickname for a dog or a toddler’s toy, but it’s a name that will stick with this child for life. Picture this: “Boomer, come here!” or “This is my dad, Boomer.” It doesn’t quite have the same ring as a traditional name, does it?
Many contemporary names fail the practicality test. Names like “Paisley” (which is a fabric pattern) or “Kattelynn” (which seems to have gone through a few too many iterations) simply don’t hold up. And let’s not even discuss the overuse of “y” to spice things up. A name like “Blade” might be cool in a video game, but it also implies that the parents spent a bit too much time in the fantasy realm.
Unique names can be wonderful—think “Persephone” or “Xanthippe.” However, unique doesn’t mean bizarre. Using references from pop culture or fantasy novels often leads to cringe-worthy results. For instance, naming your daughter “Khaleesi” or son “Peta” from series like Game of Thrones is likely to raise eyebrows (and possibly laughter).
And please, let’s talk about names that belong to pets. If you’d call your dog “Boomer” or “Fido,” it probably shouldn’t be the name of your child. The same goes for names inspired by locations you’ve never visited—Dakotas or Montanas might sound trendy, but they can evoke confusion.
At the end of the day, your child’s name reflects on you as a parent. While we’re not advocating for plain names like “John” or “Sarah,” we suggest steering clear of anything that sounds more suited for a character in a fantasy series or a dog at the park. There’s a fine line between unique and ridiculous, and it’s crucial to find a balance.
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In summary, while creativity in naming is appreciated, let’s aim to leave the eccentric names for pets and fictional characters. A name should serve a child well throughout their life, not become a source of embarrassment.