How Infertile Women Truly Wish to Answer the “Kids” Question

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“When are you planning to have kids?” If you’re a woman, particularly one who’s married, you’ve probably encountered this intrusive question more times than you can count. For those grappling with infertility, it can feel like a physical blow every time someone asks about your baby plans. They have no idea about the emotional turmoil and challenges you’ve faced in your quest to see those two pink lines on a pregnancy test.

So, how do infertile women really want to respond to that dreaded “When are you having kids?” inquiry? Here are some candid and humorous replies that capture the frustration and reality of the situation:

  1. “Once I’ve had a hysterosalpingogram to confirm my fallopian tubes are open and after I’ve given myself a gigantic HCG trigger shot in the rear to prompt ovulation. Oh, and let’s not forget the sperm that’s been meticulously processed to ensure it’s fit for the journey to my eggs.”
  2. “Seriously? Why don’t you just mind your own business?”
  3. “When I’m under anesthesia for egg retrieval, after weeks of shots in my stomach and backside. And let’s hope those eggs make it back to me after being fertilized in a lab and surviving a few days with sperm from my husband, who, by the way, had to get creative in a tiny room.”
  4. “Hmm, when do you think I should have kids? Any advice from someone who’s never had to go through any of this?”
  5. “As soon as I figure out how to make it happen.”
  6. “When you finally stop asking me that question.”
  7. “I’m working on it. Would you like to call my reproductive endocrinologist for an update? I can give you a release form, so you can get the scoop on my latest blood draws and ultrasounds. Just remember, HIPAA might slow you down a bit.”
  8. “We just tried this morning, but it’s too soon to know anything!”
  9. “Just stare blankly at them. Then start screaming incomprehensibly until they’re visibly shaken. After a few moments, take a deep breath and continue staring until they awkwardly walk away, too confused to ever ask anyone that again.”

If you’re navigating the ups and downs of home insemination, consider reading more about the process here. For those looking for practical solutions, check out this Cryobaby Home Intracervical Insemination Syringe Kit Combo, which is a great resource for aspiring parents. Additionally, for further information on IVF and related topics, this site offers excellent insights.

In summary, infertility can be an incredibly isolating and challenging experience. Women facing this struggle often wish they could respond honestly to the well-meaning, yet intrusive, questions about parenthood. A little empathy and understanding can go a long way.