The Best Resolution I Ever Made Was to Stop Mom-Shaming

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There was a time when I eagerly embraced New Year’s resolutions. Now? Not so much. The thought of adding to my to-do list just leads to feelings of disappointment when I inevitably don’t follow through. You know the drill: “Lose those last 10 pounds!” or “Work out three times a week!” or “Cut back on my nightly box of Cocoa Pebbles!” Just thinking about it makes me want to drown my sorrows in something calorically indulgent.

Over the past year, I’ve committed to living authentically and embracing my true self. This shift began after I skimmed through a book during my pregnancy—but I really took action when I felt overwhelmed with life just after my daughter’s first birthday.

So, I spent the second year of my daughter’s life on a mission to be true to myself. This means I’m working on letting go of guilt over trivial matters. When those feelings of mom guilt hit hard, I reach out to friends or family for reassurance that I’m doing a good job, because we all need a little love sometimes. And if I’m not in the mood for a family gathering, I simply say I can’t make it because I’m living my best life. It’s like YOLO, but for grown-ups!

Being true to myself also means recognizing that every other mother is navigating her own path, and she doesn’t deserve my judgment. Sure, my kid might wait patiently in line at the store, but she also has imaginary conversations with our pets. She’s a fantastic traveler who falls asleep quickly on planes, but she also enjoys butter packets and cups of sour cream straight from the container at restaurants—and I fully support that!

So no, I’m not going to side-eye another mom if her child isn’t wearing a hat in winter. Who knows what battles she faced just to get that coat zipped? As Kermit says, it’s not my business.

For all the moms out there seeking a New Year’s resolution that’s actually attainable: Be true to yourself and ditch the judgmental vibe. Seriously, let’s retire those Judgy McJudgerson Pants—we all know they were out of style ages ago!

Here are a few easy resolutions that will leave you feeling accomplished:

1. When you find yourself bored scrolling through Facebook or Instagram, instead of deleting those emails, open them up and hit “unsubscribe” from the ones you never read. You’re not going to make those Kraft recipes, and that Groupon getaway isn’t happening. It feels like tidying up, but you can do it while half-watching an episode of Grey’s Anatomy—because, let’s be real, if you’re anything like me, you’re still hooked on that show!
2. Discard your child’s artwork each night while they sleep. (Remember, live your best life! No judgment!)
3. Stop making snarky comments about other moms and women in general. It’s actually super easy—just do nothing.

And that’s it! Simple, right? You’re welcome! Happy New Year!

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