Adios, 2016: A Year to Forget

home insemination Kit

Typically, I ring in the new year in my comfiest pajamas, clutching a glass of wine in one hand and a steaming mug of coffee in the other. Staying awake until midnight is a challenge, and if I make it, I usually lean over to my partner, mumble “Happy New Year,” and then rejoice at the prospect of slipping into bed.

Honestly, I’ve never quite grasped the fuss surrounding New Year’s Eve. Why get all dressed up in uncomfortable attire and splurge on overpriced champagne while mingling with a sea of acquaintances when I could be indulging in cookie dough and wine in my cozy reindeer pajamas, re-watching Love Actually for the umpteenth time? I don’t make New Year’s resolutions and have never believed in the magical transformation a new calendar brings. January 1 is just another day, albeit with a different digit.

But this year—oh boy—this year is different. Because seriously, goodbye to the dumpster fire that was 2016!

This New Year’s Eve, I’m not celebrating with fancy getups or bubbly; instead, I’ll be toasting with two middle fingers raised high and a solid shot of bourbon. Farewell and good riddance, 2016. You’ve been an absolute whirlwind of chaos. You introduced us to the Zika virus, a resurgence of Ebola, and tainted water at the Olympics. There was the Orlando nightclub tragedy, the tragic loss of Harambe the gorilla, and an alligator that took a toddler at Disney—arguably the happiest place on earth. Seriously, 2016, did you have to ruin everything?

Every time I ventured into the comments section of an article online, I felt like I needed a hazmat suit. To top it off, the FDA warned against eating raw cookie dough, stealing away our last comfort food during this anxiety-riddled year.

The election cycle of 2016 felt reminiscent of that scene from Billy Madison where the principal declares, “What you’ve just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it.” Amen to that. We all emerged from that cycle a little less smart, and may God have mercy on our souls.

At least there was food, music, and movies, right? Nope. 2016 decided to snatch away our beloved icons like Prince, David Bowie, and Carrie Fisher, leaving us with the likes of Fuller House.

In the best of times, 2016 felt like enduring a yearlong bout of menstrual cramps coupled with violent food poisoning—complete with projectile vomiting and night sweats. Ryan Lochte, Brexit, and creepy clowns. At its worst, it was a fiery heap of nuclear waste waiting to explode. I can’t even begin to touch on the more serious tragedies of the year—police shootings, the crisis in Aleppo, and the rise of white supremacy—without breaking down, so let’s save those heavy topics for another day, shall we?

If 2016 had a slogan, it would probably be “Forget This.” Or perhaps “I Can’t Even.” There were countless days I wondered if I had accidentally stepped into an alternate universe straight out of a sci-fi thriller.

Okay, maybe I’m being a tad dramatic. Not everything was terrible in 2016. We were graced with the talent of Simone Biles and binge-worthy shows like This Is Us and Stranger Things. Some families enjoyed amazing vacations, babies were born, couples tied the knot, and the Chicago Cubs finally won the World Series!

YES, THE CUBS WON THE WORLD SERIES! As a long-suffering Cubs fan, after 108 years of disappointment, seeing my team win amidst the chaos felt like a small miracle, though it’s frustrating that this joy is overshadowed by the rest of the year’s disasters. But hey, that’s 2016 for you, right?

So, aside from the brief joy of the Cubs’ victory, 2016 felt like one colossal middle finger. It was like trudging through a storm with an umbrella that flipped inside out repeatedly until it was wrenched from my grasp. 2016 was akin to taking a tumble down a flight of stairs in front of a crowd. It felt like getting pooped on by a bird after leaving the salon with a fresh blowout. Enough already!

Now it’s our turn to give 2016 the finger. Goodbye and good riddance!

For more insights, check out this informative piece on pregnancy and home insemination from March of Dimes. And if you’re looking for a reliable home insemination kit, BabyMaker provides excellent options for your journey. Also, don’t forget to visit our privacy policy for more details on how we handle your information: Privacy Policy.

Summary

In this humorous reflection on the tumultuous year of 2016, the author expresses frustration and disbelief at the events that unfolded, from political chaos to the loss of beloved cultural icons. Despite a few bright spots, the overall sentiment is one of relief in bidding farewell to a year filled with challenges and calamities.