People often discuss how second children tend to get less attention than the first, but in my household, it’s actually our first child—our fluffy, 30-pound Sheltie mix—who’s feeling the pinch. Five years ago, she waltzed into our lives and was treated like the canine royalty she truly is. We spoiled her with gourmet bones, organic treats, and even chewable toothbrushes. Trips to the dog park were a regular occurrence, and she was the star of doggy playdates and Easter egg hunts (yes, that last one is as ridiculous as it sounds).
Our pampered pup snuggled in our bed, lounged on the couch, and relished in a never-ending supply of belly rubs. But then, a tiny 10-pound bundle of joy arrived, and our first fur baby was unceremoniously dethroned. The treats have dwindled, dog park outings are few and far between, and belly rubs have significantly decreased. It’s not that we love her any less; she will forever hold the title of our first baby.
I feel a twinge of guilt for the attention she’s missed out on, and while I’m not sure how to make it up to her, I do know that an apology is in order. So, here are a few heartfelt regrets I want to express to her after the arrival of her little brother. I truly hope she can forgive me.
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First and foremost, I’m sorry. I know this change took you by surprise. You probably thought you were destined to be the center of our universe forever. Maybe I should have shown you Lady and the Tramp as a warning. This transition is a natural part of family life, but you’ll always be our number one, even if we can’t splurge on those fancy doggy bones from the boutique anymore. I hope you can find it in your heart to understand.
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I realize you’ve been a bit neglected over the past couple of years. Your beloved ball tosses and neighborhood walks have become rare events, and your toy collection has shrunk. I’m especially ashamed of that one time we forgot to let you outside for an entire 12 hours, leading to a bladder infection. I feel truly terrible about that. I know, I know—there are no excuses, but I was a sleep-deprived zombie with a newborn. Sorry about that!
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Thank you for handling your brother’s exuberant behavior with such grace. Your ability to withstand hair-pulling and eye-gouging (and don’t worry, we’re working on that!) without a growl is nothing short of saintly. You seem to instinctively know that this squirmy little human is your sibling and important to us. That’s pretty amazing, and I’m grateful for your patience.
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I appreciate your willingness to pose for adorable family photos with the baby. Your cooperation doesn’t go unnoticed! Resting your head on our son’s back was a sweet touch, even if some of those pictures were a little demeaning. Your participation is invaluable for family morale, and I promise to try and remember to snag you a juicy bone next time I’m out—although, let’s be real, I’ll probably forget. I can hardly remember to refill the diaper bag with wipes before leaving the house!
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Most importantly, thank you for welcoming your little brother into the family. You didn’t have to do that, but you did. Living with a toddler is still better than being at the Humane Society, after all! Here’s what I can promise: you will always have shelter, food, and (somewhat inconsistent) belly rubs.
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In summary, while our lives have changed with the arrival of our son, I vow to make a conscious effort to shower our first child with the love and attention she deserves.