I Couldn’t Secure a Babysitter for Valentine’s Day, But I’m Surprisingly Okay With It

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I was in the kitchen scrolling through Facebook, desperately searching for a babysitter for Valentine’s Day, when my 7-year-old, Mia, erupted into a fit. As a parent, you quickly learn to recognize the different types of screams your children make. This one wasn’t from pain or a sibling squabble; it was pure frustration. It was the same sound she makes when she struggles with a homework problem.

This time, she was battling with the cheap, crummy Princess Mia tattoos we picked up in those overpriced Valentine’s packs at the grocery store. She wanted to tackle it solo but ended up tearing half of them apart. By the time I reached her room, there she was, sprawled on her bed, kicking her legs in a full meltdown, her face flushed from anger.

Meanwhile, my phone buzzed with messages from teens telling me they’d already committed to watching someone else’s kids on Valentine’s Day. I realized, with sinking disappointment, that I was simply too late to secure help.

That’s the reality of Valentine’s Day as a parent with young kids. Back in college, I worked at a restaurant, and Valentine’s Day was notorious for being the worst shift. Couples would occupy tables for hours, and they didn’t tip nearly as well as larger groups. I remember thinking those couples looked ridiculous, as if they were part of a cheesy Hallmark holiday designed to make people spend money. But now, in my 30s with kids, I completely understand the desire for a romantic dinner with my wife, Jess. I’d love to linger over a meal, just the two of us, but in the past decade, we’ve managed to have a proper Valentine’s dinner maybe two or three times.

Living away from family and having a couple of energetic kids makes it tough. Whenever we do find a sitter, we usually feel rushed because we don’t want to burden them for too long. I know this will change eventually; soon enough, my older son will be able to look after the younger ones. Sure, we could celebrate a few days early or late, but it just doesn’t have the same charm.

I can already hear someone reading this, ready to offer me solutions in the comments, but I’m not looking for advice. I just want to vent about the challenge of trying to be both a romantic husband and a devoted father on Valentine’s Day.

After calming Mia down and helping her separate the Valentines, she excitedly shared stories about her friends at school who would bring her special Valentines with the cutest tattoos. Then, she said, “Close your eyes, Daddy.”

I always get a bit wary when my kids ask me to close my eyes. It often leads to something sticky or wet. But I complied, as I usually do. I could hear her writing something down, and then she announced, “Okay, you can open them.”

She handed me one of her special Valentines with “Love you Dad” scrawled across it. Missing a front tooth, she grinned up at me, her bangs perfectly framing her brow. In that moment, despite my frustrations about not finding a sitter, her simple gesture melted my heart.

I thought about Jess and the family as a whole and exhaled. While Valentine’s Day may not be the picture-perfect occasion I once envisioned, it still holds its own significance, just in a different way. It’s a day to express love for those that matter most, and Mia clearly got the memo. Yes, I still wish to do something special with Jess, and I will. But for now, I need to shift my focus from disappointment to the love surrounding me.

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In summary, while I didn’t manage to find a babysitter for Valentine’s Day, I realized that the love from my daughter was more than enough. Parenting has its challenges, but those little moments of affection truly make it all worthwhile.