I can feel your disapproving gaze. You’re skeptical, maybe even a tad annoyed, and I notice you exchanging whispers with your friends, just like back in high school. I see the disdain, but honestly, it doesn’t bother me that much.
You equate being a “cool” mom with being a “bad” mom, and you’re eager to spread that opinion to anyone who’ll listen. That’s fine with me.
Perhaps you’re frustrated that my kids (and yours) genuinely enjoy my company. Despite every parenting guide insisting that you can’t be your child’s best friend, I seem to be defying that rule. My kids are thriving, not turning into little hoodlums.
Maybe you disapprove of my parenting style simply because it differs from yours. I see that judgmental squint in your eyes. While I don’t let it affect me, I’d happily skip your passive-aggressive attempts at shaming.
Why not get to know me instead? When I became a mom, I made a promise to myself that I wouldn’t lose my identity or my interests for my kids. Sure, I love them fiercely, just like you love yours, but I also enjoy my own life without hovering over them. For me, being a “good” mom doesn’t mean putting my passions, like yoga and running, on the back burner. I know that doing so would only lead to resentment, which isn’t healthy for either of us.
Yes, my kids are a bit free-range. They make their own mistakes and explore their surroundings. They might not always be spotless, and they can get wild, but I’m not micromanaging their every move. Just because I take a step back doesn’t mean I’m a bad mom.
It might annoy you that I share a similar taste in fashion with my teenage daughter, but that’s not an invitation for judgment. Sometimes, I find a quirky piece at Forever 21 that I love. So what if you think I’m trying to look younger or that my clothes aren’t age-appropriate? I’m comfortable in my skin, and my daughter thinks it’s cool enough to borrow from me. It teaches her about body positivity and self-expression—key elements of self-esteem.
Curious why all the sleepovers happen at my place? Because I believe they should be loud, fun, and a little chaotic. I prepare a giant bowl of popcorn and let them enjoy themselves.
And by the way, I’m the mom who unknowingly provides your daughter with great stories. (“Remember when Jamie’s mom went to bed and we snuck out to play ding-dong ditch?!”) Yup, I missed it because I was catching some z’s. If ding-dong ditching is the worst thing they can think of, I’m happy to let them have their fun.
So please don’t wake me up to check if your daughter is responding to your midnight texts. Isn’t it great that she’s enjoying herself instead of glued to her phone? She’s just fine.
I know it makes you cringe when your daughter tells you, “Jamie’s mom is so cool!” You have so many rules, and while some rules are necessary, ours are more about respect than control.
You believe being involved and a perfect role model at all times makes you a “good” mom, but I see it differently. Kids, especially teens, need room to make their own choices and learn from them. When they have that space, they’re more likely to share their lives with us. They need genuine adults who can offer real advice based on past experiences.
There’s nothing a teenager hates more than being lectured by someone who comes off as fake. So when I shared the story of my own embarrassing teenage moment, the one where I got sick after drinking at a party, your daughter found it surprisingly relatable. I know you might not want to hear that, but it helped her.
Despite your feelings toward me, I’m still looking out for your daughter. When she made an unkind remark about you, I quickly shut it down. And when she wanted to discuss birth control, I gently reminded her that you’re the one she should talk to about it. Because you’re her mom, not me.
And that’s just how I roll.
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Summary
In a world where parenting styles are often scrutinized, Jamie Reynolds embraces her role as a “cool” mom, emphasizing individuality and respect over strict rules. She encourages her children to explore, make mistakes, and enjoy life without hovering. By fostering a genuine connection, she aims to be a supportive figure in her children’s lives while navigating judgment from others.