I’ve never been one to hold my tongue. Growing up, I often heard things like, “Jamie, shh,” “Jamie, that’s inappropriate,” and “Jamie, can you keep it down for just five minutes?” Especially that one time at three years old when I innocently asked my dad’s friend if he had “a peanut.” He thought he was just coming over for dinner; little did he know he was meeting the future queen of candid conversations! Mortified, he was. Me? I was just focused on dressing my Barbie in a bra.
With my vocal nature comes a fearless personality. I’m game to discuss anything with almost anyone. I dive straight into topics and have zero shame in asking questions—especially about sex. So, when my little sister asked me what a blow job was during a car ride home from McDonald’s, I answered her directly. We couldn’t help but giggle over sodas, pondering why it’s called a blow job when… well, you don’t blow. Classic.
Many of us weren’t raised discussing sex openly. It’s often a touchy subject that can feel secretive or taboo, leading to feelings of shame—what a bummer! For some, simply mentioning the word “sex” can trigger physical discomfort, prompting fidgeting, nervous giggles, or even an urgent “bathroom break.” But there are those among us who want to break free from that discomfort. We crave knowledge, seek to enhance our intimate lives, and recognize that feeling sexual is a natural, healthy part of being human. We want to relax when this topic comes up.
Some folks struggle to admit they enjoy sex, unsure of what the “normal” level of desire is. But here’s the deal: your desires are yours, and you don’t owe anyone an explanation—unless you choose to share. If you’re yearning to chat more about sex—whether it’s the beauty of intimacy with a partner or solo exploration—go for it! Embracing this desire doesn’t make you scandalous; it’s a normal human inclination, and there’s no shame in it.
And if you believe sex should remain a private affair, that’s perfectly fine too. I’m just not wired that way. I love discussing my body, arousal, and yes, even buying those battery-operated buddies (BOBs). If you want to feel more at ease in these conversations, here are some tips to help:
1. Find a Trusted Confidant
Talk to someone who won’t judge you, like a partner or an open-minded friend. This can make sharing your thoughts easier, and your partner will likely be thrilled to dive into discussions that enhance your intimate life. The more you do it, the more natural it becomes!
2. Shake Things Up
Sometimes, trying something new can break the ice. Approach your partner about exploring different experiences together—it’s a fantastic way to ease into discussing your desires. If face-to-face chat feels daunting, start with a text. Just opening up the topic is a big step, so do it in a way that feels safe.
3. Embrace Your Sexuality
Many women, especially moms, might feel they should suppress their desires as they age or settle into routine. But you can be both the confident woman and the nurturing mom! Acknowledge that discussing and enjoying sex is a healthy part of self-love and should be embraced for your well-being.
4. Treat Yourself to New Lingerie
Beautiful underwear can do wonders for your confidence. You don’t need to go all out with sexy thongs—just find something that makes you feel fabulous. When you feel good about your body, it’s easier to voice your desires or show someone what you enjoy. Plus, exploring oils and toys can open you up to new experiences (and hey, who doesn’t love a good massage?).
5. Because Orgasms Matter
Talking about sex can get you in the mood, and let’s be honest—orgasms are amazing! Whether they come from a partner or solo play, they’re healthy and worth pursuing.
So, get comfortable and start chatting! Sex is an essential, enjoyable topic that deserves discussion. Don’t let discomfort hold you back. Engaging in open conversations, expressing your desires, and educating yourself is entirely normal and beneficial. You’re definitely not alone in wanting to be more candid about this subject.
For more insights on starting your journey toward parenthood, check out our other blog posts on intracervical insemination. And if you’re looking for authoritative information on artificial insemination, visit Make A Mom. For a comprehensive overview of fertility treatments, WebMD is an excellent resource.
Summary
Discussing sexual desires can be intimidating, but it’s essential for personal empowerment and well-being. By finding a trustworthy confidant, trying new experiences, embracing your sexuality, investing in self-confidence, and recognizing the importance of orgasms, you can feel more at ease talking about sex. It’s all part of being human and should be celebrated!