How to Cope with a Velcro Baby: A Survival Guide

Five years ago, I welcomed my first baby boy and was filled with curiosity about what motherhood would entail. My partner and I were complete novices—terrified, if I’m honest. We had never changed a diaper, fed a baby, or even held a newborn. We struggled to keep a succulent alive, which is saying something!

Surprisingly, parenting turned out to be easier than we expected. Our firstborn was a natural; he breastfed and bottle-fed like a pro, slept through the night at just six weeks, and rarely cried. We thought, “What’s all the fuss about?”

Fast forward to our second child, and it’s a whole new ballgame. We now have what I affectionately refer to as a “velcro baby.” If you’re unfamiliar, a velcro baby is one that clings to you like a burr; remove them, and they’ll scream like they’re auditioning for a horror film. The only time they’re content is when they’re nestled in your arms.

Sounds enchanting, doesn’t it? And most of the time, it is! But let’s face it, sometimes you need to handle basic human activities like using the restroom or shaving your legs. This little one wants to be right there with you—eating, sleeping, playing, and yes, even pooping (in a diaper—most of the time). If you’ve been blessed with such a delightful challenge, here are some survival tips:

1. Embrace Baby Wearing

If you don’t own a Baby Bjorn, Moby wrap, or any baby carrier, head to Target immediately! These carriers are lifesavers, allowing you to tackle chores while keeping your baby close. You’ll strengthen your arms and core in the process. Who needs a gym membership when you can lift a baby?

2. Seek Help

It’s unrealistic to pause your entire life just to hold your baby around the clock. If you have work or other kids, find some assistance. Whether it’s a family member, babysitter, or even a kind stranger at the grocery store, the answer should always be “YES.” With no family nearby, I decided to send my little one to Mother’s Day Out a couple of days a week, and it was the best decision for my sanity. It gives me time to work and breathe—both essential for survival!

3. Let Them Cry Sometimes

Watching your velcro baby cry can be gut-wrenching, but it’s a natural part of babyhood. I recommend learning to tune it out or investing in earplugs or a sound machine. Your baby will be okay, I promise! Studies suggest that a bit of crying isn’t harmful—though I might be embellishing to ease my own conscience. After all, our parents let us cry while they sipped coffee next door, and we survived just fine.

4. Have a Transfer Plan

You need sleep, and your baby can’t sleep on you forever. Transitioning them to the crib can feel like a circus act. I make sure to change their diaper, dim the lights, and get them into their sleepwear before the last feeding. Then, I text my partner to help with the transfer. We crawl out of the room like ninjas, hoping our baby doesn’t wake up. It’s all about strategy!

5. Get Out and About

Participate in activities like music classes or join a gym where you can hold your baby while meeting other adults. This not only helps with socialization for your baby but also gives you a break. I’ve suddenly become the queen of social gatherings; people love to hold the baby, giving me a moment to enjoy my margarita in peace. Sometimes all a mom needs is a 20-minute breather!

It can be tough to maintain your sanity when it feels like you have a mini human glued to you, but remember: this is just a phase. With my firstborn, I often prioritized chores over cuddles, and I regret it. Being forced to slow down and hold my newborn has been a precious gift. Who cares about clean dishes and folded laundry anyway?

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Summary

Navigating life with a velcro baby can be a challenge, but with tips on baby-wearing, seeking help, allowing some crying, creating a transfer plan, and getting out of the house, you can maintain your sanity while enjoying precious moments with your little one. Remember, it’s just a temporary season of life.