March 27, 2023
When I was getting to know my future partner, he had a favorite phrase that drove me up the wall. You know the one—“It is what it is.” It seemed harmless at first, but when you throw it into real-life scenarios, it becomes grating. Picture this: you lock your keys in the car, need to call a locksmith, and end up late for a job interview, costing you a potential job and 50 bucks. And there he is, shrugging with, “It is what it is.” What emoji would even begin to express that frustration? Honestly, he’s lucky I said yes!
When my daughter was diagnosed with special needs, I was inundated with variations of the same phrase. Over time, I learned to accept it, because that’s what it’s meant to do—help you move past the initial shock to find a solution. But as I watched my daughter blossom into this radiant little being who could charm anyone with her infectious laugh and spontaneous hugs, I realized her condition wasn’t so bleak after all. She was the happiest kid I knew. So what if she needed a little extra support?
I stumbled upon the concept known as the “happiness paradox” during a fascinating BBC interview with Dr. Jane Thompson, a sociologist specializing in disability studies. The idea is that people with disabilities often report higher levels of happiness compared to those without. It’s a curious phenomenon: having less can sometimes mean appreciating more.
At first, I bristled at the term. I worried it would box my daughter in, diminishing her depth and complexity as a person. She isn’t blissfully unaware; she’s a tech-savvy kid with a remarkable imagination. Her world is a vivid tapestry of experiences that I envy. Why should her joy be seen as a paradox?
Then I flipped the narrative. This wasn’t merely about a disability paradox; it was about a universal happiness paradox. Think of those folks who seemingly have it all—the cars, the homes, the Instagram-worthy lives. Yet, they often seem the most restless and discontented. Why does the lottery winner feel euphoric for just a fleeting moment before returning to their old habits? Because we’re always chasing more.
My daughter’s joy paradox is this: she genuinely appreciates what she has. Not because she’s naive, but because her experience has shaped her to prioritize what truly matters—people, laughter, connection.
So, what if we all took a moment to stretch our souls instead of scrambling for the next big thing? What if we allowed happiness to wrap around us like a comforting blanket? What if the answer we seek isn’t more stuff, but rather time spent with others? We could potentially turn the paradox on its head and discover happiness without strings attached. What if that most annoying phrase—“It is what it is”—could be reframed to mean that the “is” is actually pretty great?
In this journey, it’s crucial to remember that resources exist to help navigate your path. For more information, check out this insightful post on home insemination, or explore the excellent resource on pregnancy and home insemination at News Medical.
Summary
The piece explores the concept of the happiness paradox, emphasizing how those with fewer material possessions often find greater joy in life. The author reflects on personal experiences with her special needs daughter, illustrating that true happiness comes from appreciation of the present and meaningful connections with others.