As my psychiatrist set down her pen, she said, “I think you might have ADD.” I couldn’t hold back my tears. The anxiety over finances had spiraled out of control to the point where I didn’t even have a checking account. I couldn’t estimate our mortgage payment, and our water was frequently shut off due to overlooked bills. We had the funds—I just forgot to pay. My car was a treasure trove of discarded trash, and I was constantly forgetting essentials like diaper bags and lunchboxes.
At 34, I received a diagnosis that explained the chaos in my life: I had the inattentive form of ADD (ADHD without the hyperactivity). It turns out I’m not alone in this struggle. Reports indicate that from 2008 to 2012, ADHD medication use soared by a whopping 85% among women aged 26 to 34. Patricia Quinn, MD, director of the National Center for Women and Girls with ADHD, states that women who weren’t diagnosed as children typically receive their diagnosis between ages 36 and 38. Many were misclassified with depression or anxiety disorders, which only addressed the symptoms and not the underlying issue—ADHD.
Historical Context
Historically, many women went undiagnosed for several reasons. The DSM-IV required symptom onset by age 7, and studies mainly focused on hyperactive boys, neglecting the subtle ways ADHD manifests in girls. The DSM-V has since amended this age to 12, allowing more women to meet diagnostic criteria.
Growing Awareness
Awareness is growing regarding how ADHD presents itself, especially in adult women. Instead of being boisterous and impulsive like young boys, women with ADHD often struggle with daily tasks such as balancing a checkbook. According to ADDitude Magazine, we frequently feel like life is spiraling out of control. The thought of hosting guests can be terrifying because of the mess we perceive. We often find ourselves overwhelmed, and even the idea of adding “one more thing” can send us into a tailspin. We spend countless hours coping, searching for lost items, and covering up our struggles. People may judge us as inconsiderate for forgetting to send birthday or thank-you cards.
I can relate. I remember the mountain of wedding thank-yous I procrastinated on. After purchasing $75 worth of beautiful cards, I spent a single night in a frenzied rush writing heartfelt notes. Yet, those cards sat untouched in my closet until our fifth anniversary. This isn’t just a tale of a hyperactive child; ADHD manifests differently in girls, which is why diagnoses are often missed. An article from Quartz notes that girls typically show the inattentive type of ADHD, leading to issues like disorganization and a tendency to seem “spacey.” We sometimes mask our symptoms, trying to meet societal expectations of being organized and composed. Unfortunately, studies show that girls with ADHD are significantly more likely to experience suicidal thoughts and self-harm compared to their peers.
The Ongoing Struggle
The struggles don’t end in adolescence. According to the Anxiety and Depression Association of America, around 50% of adults with ADHD also deal with anxiety disorders. Many women may find themselves battling depression, bipolar disorder, or other psychiatric issues as a consequence of living with untreated ADHD for years. As Michelle Frank, a clinical psychologist, points out, we may have a generation of women who were diagnosed later in life after managing their symptoms alone for far too long.
Finding Help
As awareness increases, so too do diagnoses among women. Finding the right medication can feel like juggling flaming torches, especially if you already have anxiety issues. I experienced imposter syndrome for a year after my diagnosis, convinced that I was just pretending to have ADD to cover my own shortcomings. Even now, remnants of my childhood echo in my mind: “Hurry up!” “Stop daydreaming!” “What’s your problem?”
But there’s a silver lining! If you relate to the symptoms outlined by ADDitude Magazine, don’t hesitate to schedule an appointment with your doctor. You can finally reclaim your life. The days of being the mom who forgets the wipes and has trash spilling from her car are over. Embrace the clutter of kids’ shoes and stuffed animals without feeling overwhelmed. You can be the parent you were meant to be without sacrificing your sanity.
Additional Resources
If you’re interested in learning more about home insemination, check out these valuable resources: Intracervical Insemination and Cryobaby Home Insemination Kit for expert insights. Also, WebMD is a fantastic resource for understanding pregnancy and home insemination.
Conclusion
In summary, it’s essential to recognize that ADHD can affect women in unique ways, often leading to late diagnoses. Understanding these differences can empower women to seek help and reclaim control over their lives.