I’m a proud owner of ADHD, paired with a sprinkle of anxiety disorder. My psychiatrist says it’s pretty common to juggle both, which makes me feel less unique and more like a member of the socially awkward club. Unfortunately, these conditions come with a hefty side of awkwardness. You know that kid who always blurts out random answers that don’t quite fit the question? Yep, that was me. In grad school, my partner likened me to a quirky character from a fantasy series. While it was meant as a compliment, it still rings true: I often drift through life, blissfully unaware of essential social cues. It’s annoying, frustrating, and mostly just downright awkward.
1. I often don’t realize when I’m being odd.
In the show Sherlock, the character Holmes is known for ignoring social cues. I wish I had a trusty friend like John Watson to give me a nudge when I’m acting strange. Half the time, I’m lost in my thoughts, oblivious to a conversation happening right in front of me. Or I can engage in what I think is a delightful chat, only to discover later that we’ve met before and I repeated myself.
2. But I constantly fear I’m being odd.
I’ve had enough social flubs to know that I might not always play by the rules, and it terrifies me. Picture this: I bump into my favorite barista at the mall. Should I greet her? If I do, where does the conversation go? What are the social norms here? Most people navigate these interactions seamlessly, while I secretly hope for an urgent restroom break for my kids to save me from the awkwardness.
3. I’m not ignoring you.
I have a few social habits that might come off as me being bored. For instance, I tend to check my phone way too often. It’s an ADHD thing — my brain lights up like a Christmas tree when I scroll through notifications. So while I might look distracted, I’m actually still listening to you. I also have a habit of staring off into space or frantically scanning for my children, who may or may not be engaged in a wrestling match somewhere nearby.
4. My friends are often just as awkward.
From my school days, I’ve always gravitated toward the quirky crowd. In high school, I found my tribe among fellow oddballs. As a mom, I connect with other unique mothers—like those who brew their own kombucha while also owning a collection of firearms. We embrace our messy homes and peculiar hobbies, like obsessively kayaking or binge-watching niche sci-fi shows. Our conversations often drift into the realm of fantasy literature, proving that we’re all a bit peculiar.
5. I worry my kids will inherit my awkwardness.
Fortunately, my spouse is delightfully normal, or my kids might be in for a wild ride. I’m anxious they’ll adopt my odd little quirks that make social interactions challenging. For instance, they might struggle to relate to their peers when they’re obsessed with the intricacies of the Revolutionary War. Will they find friends? Will those friends accept their enthusiastic renditions of historical figures in a quirky voice?
6. I forget things… a lot.
When I say I forget things, I’m talking about names, faces, and even past encounters. Running into that barista at the mall? It’s a miracle I recalled her face. I often lose track of how many kids you have or what your hobbies are, which sends me into a panic. I’ll start picking at my cuticles or checking my phone while desperately trying to mask my fear of awkward silence.
7. I might interrupt with a random thought.
While most people’s minds follow a straight path, mine takes a scenic route. I might suddenly blurt out a story about my pet while discussing something completely unrelated. This is just part of my ADHD nature and pure awkwardness. I hope you can roll with it and return to the original topic, as I tend to juggle multiple conversational threads at once.
8. I genuinely mean it as a compliment.
When I see something I admire, I’ll likely voice it — even if it’s to a total stranger about their fabulous hairstyle. But then I panic, worried I may have crossed a line into awkward territory.
9. I replay social interactions in my head.
If I had a conversation with you today, I’ve probably replayed every word in my mind, fixating on anything I might have said that could be deemed weird or off-putting. I often convince myself that you must hate me now, despite having missed the actual cues that indicate otherwise.
10. But I can’t tell if you actually dislike me.
I struggle with reading social cues, which makes interactions confusing. For instance, there’s a person I know who comes off as gruff, but I’ve learned she’s actually quite sweet. Nevertheless, every time I speak with her, I can’t shake the feeling that she thinks I’m ridiculous.
11. I don’t know when to stop talking.
This often leads to me monologuing or sharing far too much personal information. Casual friends don’t need to know about my breastfeeding journey or my obsession with a certain character from a TV show. I forget that these tidbits might be considered weird to others.
Being socially awkward can be a tough road. Making new friends feels like climbing a mountain, and casual interactions can turn into treacherous minefields. You tend to obsess over social details, often focusing on the wrong ones. Plus, there’s the added stress of worrying about your kids picking up your quirks, your friends’ opinions of you, and what strangers might think of your social skills. It can be isolating, but remember, you’re not alone in this quirky journey. Or are you?
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