Recently, I stumbled across a blog post that detailed a family’s mission to pay off their mortgage early. They chose to skip a trip to Disneyland, which the mom claimed was a necessary sacrifice, even though “it hurts to think my 3-year-old is missing out on that experience.” Really?
Let’s be honest: a 3-year-old won’t remember that trip to Disneyland a year later. And guess what? That same toddler would probably find just as much joy blowing bubbles in the driveway or enjoying a pudding pop.
There’s nothing inherently wrong with Disneyland, but I’m starting to sense a troubling trend in our culture: we have a serious case of FOMO—fear of missing out—but it’s not for ourselves; it’s for our kids.
When Did Childhood Become a Checklist?
When did childhood turn into a checklist of “must-have experiences?” Parenting is becoming like a competitive sport where our score is determined by how many extravagant experiences we provide for our little ones.
Sure, we’re motivated by love, but we need to take a step back. The aim of parenting isn’t to create teenagers with a fully checked-off bucket list.
We’re driving ourselves crazy trying to ensure our kids check off every fun activity, visit every exciting place, and have all the adventures before they even know how to manage their own bank accounts. But here’s the reality: we don’t need to cram an entire lifetime of experiences into just 18 years. Our primary job is to ensure our children feel safe and loved. That’s it.
Enjoying the Simple Moments
If you enjoy fancy vacations and can afford them, go for it; they can be a blast. But don’t let the idea that your child is missing out cloud your enjoyment. There’s no official list of activities that define a good childhood.
Remember, you’re raising children, not crafting a resume. Parenting isn’t about orchestrating a series of “once-in-a-lifetime” experiences; it’s about nurturing well-rounded, healthy individuals—and there are countless ways to achieve that, some of which don’t involve a trip to Disneyland.
Not every experience that builds your child’s character will be found on a list of 101 Amazing Things Your Kids Must Do Before They Grow Up. In fact, many of the moments that shape your kids’ lives could be simpler, more affordable, and closer to home.
It’s Okay to Miss Out
And when your child returns to school and shares their “What I did over my summer vacation” essay, it might not sound as thrilling as their classmates’ stories. That’s perfectly okay. Due to finances, distance, family situations, or countless other reasons, your children will inevitably “miss out” on experiences we might wish for them. But honestly, that doesn’t matter as much as we often think it does. If they know what it feels like to be loved and secure while growing up, you’re already giving them the most valuable experience of all.
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Conclusion
In summary, it’s time to let go of the FOMO we feel for our children. The best gift we can give them is the assurance of our love and support, which is far more important than any extravagant experience.