They’ve all grown up so quickly. Everyone warned you it would happen in the blink of an eye, and even though you knew it was coming, the rapid passage of time still takes your breath away. You find yourself longing for moments you never thought you’d miss, including the chaotic experience of dining out with little ones.
You might reminisce about how they’d wiggle and squirm in their seats like they had ants in their pants, or how they’d use your body as a climbing frame to peek at the diners next to you.
You’ll miss the way their tiny feet would find their way to your face while you delicately maneuvered a fork to your mouth, as if you were defusing a bomb instead of simply trying to eat. Honestly, you’ll miss sharing a meal with someone’s backside in your face.
You’ll miss the frantic leaps from your seat when one child announces they need to use the restroom, only to have the next one follow suit moments later. You’ll miss the tug-of-war for the croutons on your plate, holding your breath in anticipation of whether you’ll ever get to eat them again.
You’ll remember the shock of cold water splashing onto your lap when someone spills their drink, or how chubby little fingers would sneak food from your mouth while you were still chewing, only for them to decide they didn’t like it and return it to you.
You might even find yourself missing the cheap house chardonnay that you’d gulp down like it was soda. The thrill of watching crayons hit the floor repeatedly, leading to an expedition under the table to retrieve them—what a delightful nightmare that was! And you’ll ponder why we make crayons round, inviting frustration to tiny hands.
You’ll miss reaching into those little mouths to fish out the straw wrapper, or the sibling squabbles that anchored every meal and ended with tears—mostly yours. The endless cycle of nose-picking and butt-scratching, followed by constant hand-washing, will leave your skin flaking like breadcrumbs.
The ritual of scanning the menu for their orders, sometimes forgetting to order your own, will be a cherished memory. You’ll chuckle at the chaos left in the wake of their meals, as if a small hurricane has swept through your table.
You may even find yourself tipping more than the meal cost itself to make up for the pandemonium. I promise you, when your children are grown, you will look back on these moments with nostalgia. So take them out to eat, despite the spills and messes, because one day, you might miss it.
But as I look at my now-grown children, I often find myself reaching for takeout menus instead. I’ll mutter a truth of parenting that has stood the test of time: “Hello, Pizza Hut? I’d like to place an order for delivery.”
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In summary, while the chaos of dining out with children can be overwhelming, these moments are fleeting and precious. Embrace them while you can, but don’t hesitate to opt for simpler solutions when needed.