As I entered the gym locker room, my friend casually remarked, “You look so skinny!” This comment often follows periods when I’ve been unwell or injured, and while it’s intended as a compliment, it misses the mark. My natural body type tends to be slender, but after a break from exercising, I notice that my limbs lose muscle definition, yet this is interpreted as being “skinny.”
The term “skinny” is typically viewed positively, but I don’t see it that way. My motivation for working out isn’t about achieving a certain appearance. My 18-year battle with depression has taught me that the endorphin rush from exercise helps stabilize my mood and complements my antidepressant.
When someone tells me I look skinny, it doesn’t feel like a compliment. It’s merely a judgment on my body. We wouldn’t think to tell someone they’ve gained weight or ask when they’ll start exercising, so why is it acceptable to comment on someone’s weight loss? Compliments on appearance can inadvertently uphold harmful societal standards that equate self-worth with body image.
This issue is particularly relevant for women like me, who grew up surrounded by dieting culture and constant body scrutiny. Even as we strive to promote body positivity for the next generation, we often find ourselves unconsciously perpetuating these standards.
Many women feel pressured by the flood of fitness and diet content on social media, but what about those who face health challenges, single parenthood, or simply choose not to obsess over their bodies? The media continues to focus on celebrity bodies, reducing them to mere objects of scrutiny rather than acknowledging their humanity.
Recently, I overheard a girl in my daughter’s art club bragging about her small stomach. I felt compelled to intervene, playfully demonstrating that it doesn’t matter what size your tummy is, but rather that it functions well. The girls laughed, momentarily distracted from the pressures of appearance.
There is no single right way to have a body. Even well-meaning comments about body shape can reinforce negative judgments. So please, refrain from calling me skinny. My goal is to prioritize health and happiness without fixating on appearance.
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In summary, while comments on body size may be intended as compliments, they often perpetuate harmful standards and don’t reflect the complexities of one’s health journey. It’s essential to focus on well-being rather than appearance, promoting a positive body image for ourselves and future generations.