“I would prefer that children express themselves through dance rather than be confined to tests.” This was my response to a parent visiting the school I manage. Our institution caters to children with unique challenges who may struggle in traditional educational settings, so understandably, parents arrive with numerous inquiries. This particular mother wanted to know about our assessment methods and how we track student progress. My intention was to share my philosophy:
If you view education solely as a series of metrics, this may not be the right place for you.
I wasn’t dismissing her concerns; they are valid and shared among many parents today. However, I wanted her to grasp that I believe education encompasses much more than just grades — a perspective that seems overshadowed in our current system.
The reality is that children remain fundamentally unchanged over time. They continue to be curious, fun-loving, naturally empathetic, and exploratory. What has shifted are the unrealistic pressures we impose on them. Starting from preschool and advancing through elementary school, there is often an excessive emphasis on academics at the expense of social interactions and physical play. This raises the question: would we see so many children diagnosed with learning differences and ADHD if we didn’t impose such unnatural schedules and expectations on them?
Today, we expect perfection from our children. Furthermore, many parents feel the pressure to be flawless as well—almost 80% according to recent studies. But let’s be honest: I’ve yet to meet a perfect child, and I certainly don’t claim to be a perfect parent myself.
My passion for children and childhood is what drives me as an educator and as the leader of an independent school. Every day, I interact with 75 incredible kids—wonderful, not perfect.
So, my message to parents, both from my position as an educator and as a fellow parent, is to let go of the pursuit of perfection. Allow yourself and your children to be human. Focus less on the metrics and more on the enriching experiences.
We should celebrate and appreciate the unique qualities that make our children who they are. Their imperfections? They should not be our focus. Instead, let’s encourage them to relish the joy of dancing rather than stumble over the need to measure their every move. For more insights on navigating parenting challenges, check out this other blog post here.
In summary, we must shift our approach to parenting from striving for perfection to embracing the beautiful imperfections that make childhood a joyful experience. Resources like Progyny can provide valuable information on related topics such as pregnancy and home insemination. And for those exploring self-insemination options, Make a Mom offers authoritative guidance.