It didn’t truly resonate with me until I made that phone call.
“Hello, yes, I’m calling to register my daughter for kindergarten this fall. What steps do I need to take?”
And then, it all came crashing down.
This is it. The final months I have with my daughter before she embarks on her educational journey. In September, she will transition from my care to the guidance of her (trained, professional, nurturing) teachers. She’ll meet new friends, some of whom may be kind, while others may not. For countless hours each day, I won’t be there to protect her from negativity or celebrate her achievements. She won’t be solely my responsibility anymore. She’ll be carving her own path. On her own.
The thought is daunting. While being a stay-at-home mom isn’t exactly my forte, I am accustomed to being there for her needs and having a reasonable grasp on our daily routine. But with school on the horizon, our days and nights will require a lot more structure. I’ve cherished our free-spirited weekdays, and soon, that freedom will transform.
Yet, the part of me that craves a little less control is eager for this change. My daughter, the social butterfly, is buzzing with anticipation. This is a significant milestone, a chance for her to thrive, but until that time arrives, we will savor these last few months together.
We’ll embrace the freedom to do what we want, whenever we want, before the rhythm of the school year takes over. If she wants to lounge in her pajamas until noon, we’ll do just that. Want to catch a matinee of the latest animated film? Absolutely! Late-night cuddle sessions because we don’t have to wake up early? Bring it on.
I know that when September arrives and she boards the school bus for the first time, the world won’t end, but this chapter of our lives will close, and that’s a bittersweet reality. I want to relish every moment with her. I want to engage in playtime with dolls, host tea parties, and enjoy dress-up adventures. I want her to fully embrace her childhood, to believe that it will last forever, even though it won’t.
School has become increasingly demanding at younger ages than when I was a child. So, until the day arrives filled with No. 2 pencils, binders, and permission slips, I want her to have as much carefree fun as possible. And I want to be right there alongside her.
My little girl, my firstborn, is growing up. I’m certainly not prepared for it, and I will undoubtedly be a teary mess on her first day. But until then, I choose to embrace our carefree life for as long as I can. I’m saying “yes” when she asks to play, when she wants to read, and when she wants to watch one more show after her brother has drifted off to sleep in my lap. It’s the least I can do—I will miss her presence greatly.
Starting school marks the beginning of a journey toward independence, where she will no longer be solely under my watchful eye. Everything changes after this point. While I still have her with me, I will shower her with love and attention, so when she walks through those school doors, she knows she is cherished, strong, and capable of achieving anything she desires. And at the end of every day, her mom will always be there for her.
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Summary: As my daughter prepares to start kindergarten, I’m cherishing our final moments together. While the transition feels daunting, I’m committed to making the most of our time before school begins, embracing the freedom of our current stage while preparing her for the adventure ahead.