When I was a child, my mom would ask me to wash the dishes, and I would stomp my way to the sink, grumbling, “The only reason you had kids was to avoid chores!” Now that I’m a parent, I see how silly that statement was. People don’t have kids solely to delegate chores; they have kids to build a family — and unexpectedly create a small army of helpers for all the mundane tasks that come with running a household. It’s a no-brainer. Kids are like free labor, and it’s beneficial for them as they learn about responsibility and work ethic. So when I ask my kids to pitch in, I’m not just being a good parent; I’m also reclaiming some of my time for important adult activities, like dreaming about projects I’ll never actually do.
Maintaining a household is a monumental task, and I recently made the decision that my kids need to start contributing. If they’re going to use up all my toilet paper, consume my entire data plan, and leave my pantry bare, then they might as well help out while living rent-free.
Until now, their chores have mostly revolved around cleaning up after themselves — making their beds, clearing their plates after meals, and so on. However, despite my constant reminders for them to tidy up, a significant amount of my time is still consumed by picking up their messes and throwing away wrappers they’ve hidden between couch cushions because the garbage can is “too far away.”
I often did things myself because it seemed easier in the moment. I’ve been managing our household routine for so long that it’s second nature to me. But I’ve realized that I’m not doing my kids any favors by taking on most of the responsibilities. If I don’t teach them how to handle these tasks or set the expectation that they need to help, I’m signaling that it’s not their job — which it is. I can’t bear the thought of raising teenagers who see me as their maid or, worse, adults who leave their dirty underwear on the floor for their partners to deal with.
So, I’ve reached my limit. This fed-up mom is determined to get her kids involved in household chores. There’s just one small hiccup: I’m a neat freak with high standards, and they’re young kids who couldn’t care less about cleanliness. If I replaced the couch with a mountain of empty pizza boxes, they’d just find a way to make themselves comfortable on top of it all.
For the sake of our home, I’m trying to set aside my high expectations as they stumble through chores, complaining and dawdling along the way. It drives me up the wall! As they tackle tasks like scooping the litter box, I stand by, biting my tongue and restraining myself from intervening. My outward appearance may be calm, but my inner monologue is a whirlwind: “No, don’t use your hands! Just shake the scoop! Why is there litter everywhere?!”
As they pour an excessive amount of detergent into the washer, I can already picture a bubble explosion in the laundry room. I could probably enjoy a spa day in the time it takes them to clean the toilet properly, but I’m stuck supervising. Regardless of how long it takes or how awkward they seem, I keep my comments to a minimum, only stepping in with helpful suggestions. Just like when they think brushing means only cleaning the front teeth, they need to learn how to do these chores on their own. And the only way to facilitate that is to loosen the reins and let them learn — even if it’s exasperating.
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In summary, teaching kids to contribute to household chores is a challenging but necessary task for parents. It’s essential for their growth and helps prepare them for the responsibilities of adulthood, even if it means enduring some messy moments along the way.