Imagine this: A man approaches a woman at a bar where she’s happily engaged in conversation with her friends. He sidles up next to her, introduces himself, and offers her a drink. “I’m just here to enjoy time with my friends,” she responds, repeatedly. Yet, he continues to press with personal questions, seemingly impervious to her disinterest and her friends’ eye rolls. After a long, uncomfortable exchange, she finally states, “I have a boyfriend.” He reluctantly steps back, hands raised defensively, saying, “It’s fine, it’s fine. I understand.”
Her clear rejections fell on deaf ears. His disregard for her wishes highlighted a troubling reality: the pervasive attitude of entitlement that some men harbor over women’s autonomy. While many men approach women with respect, too many others display a troubling insensitivity that can be alarming.
This issue is deeply rooted in a sense of ownership. The entitlement is often evident in alarming news stories: a man violently retaliates against a woman who rebuffs his advances, or commits heinous acts against those close to a woman who decides to leave him. The underlying message is chilling—many men feel they possess rights over women, a sentiment that is subtly ingrained in our culture and reinforced in daily interactions.
Our society sends a disheartening message that women are property, with men entitled to dictate their worth and behavior. This notion is perpetuated through traditions, historical practices, and social norms that objectify women, reducing them to mere transactions or spoils of war. Women have long been labeled either as virtuous or promiscuous, and while most men may not overtly view women as property, the implications are woven into the very fabric of our culture.
The issue extends beyond aggressive advances in bars. It’s present in the man who demands a woman smile, as if her happiness is his to control. It’s the catcaller who feels entitled to a woman’s attention simply because of her presence. It’s the judgment faced by women who express themselves freely, as if their demeanor must conform to someone else’s standards.
The concept of the “friend-zone” embodies this entitlement, where men feel rejected simply for not getting what they want in a relationship. Online, powerful women face harassment and threats, often targeted just for existing in spaces they feel threatened by, simply because they dare to be visible and successful.
These ingrained attitudes manifest in countless ways—public breastfeeding often draws scorn while women are pressured to conform to unrealistic beauty standards. Women are bombarded with expectations on how to behave, how to speak, and how to present themselves to be deemed acceptable. This societal pressure can feel suffocating, as if women must navigate a minefield of male expectations.
Our bodies, our identities, and our choices should not be dictated by anyone else. The anger directed at women who don’t fit the mold, whether they are plus-sized, transgender, or simply assertive, reveals a pervasive sense of ownership that needs to be dismantled.
Women are not trophies for men to claim; we are not here to fulfill anyone’s expectations or desires. Our lives, choices, and identities are our own. It is crucial for all of us to recognize when we see ownership in action and to challenge those behaviors—whether it’s through conversations with friends, family, or coworkers.
We need to advocate for a change in mindset, particularly for the next generation. Help us create a future where young girls are not shamed for their bodies, where their safety is prioritized, and where they are not objectified or dismissed. Support us in amplifying the message that women are not possessions or excuses for men’s frustrations.
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In summary, women are not objects to be owned or controlled. It’s time to challenge the cultural norms that contribute to this pervasive sense of entitlement. We deserve to be seen as individuals with autonomy and agency, not as mere extensions of someone else’s desires.