Dear Mom Friend,
I see you.
Today is Mother’s Day, and chances are someone is whipping up a breakfast treat for you. They might even bring it to your bed, allowing you to savor it while you enjoy a rare moment of peace. There may be flowers, jewelry, and those adorable homemade cards waiting for you downstairs. While these gestures are lovely, I understand that they may not quite fill the void you feel.
What you truly long for is recognition. You want someone to acknowledge the weight you carry, the struggles that often go unnoticed. You are a resilient matriarch, yet you yearn for someone to swoop in and lighten your load, even if just for a fleeting moment.
I see you. If no one else does, please know that I do. Lately, you might have felt invisible, and that can be incredibly isolating.
As women, we’re conditioned to appear as though we have everything under control, to fulfill our roles with minimal fuss. Meanwhile, those around us may take our efforts for granted, leading to a disconnect that can be frustrating. Though motherhood is indeed a blessing, it can feel like a burden that others may never fully comprehend.
It’s a “gift,” they say, but some days, you may wish you could return it. Let’s be honest—cramming a four-year-old back into your body just isn’t feasible.
Perhaps your partner has been a source of stress lately. You’re utterly exhausted, and all you want is a moment of rest. On a rare day when your partner is home, even a brief nap can seem like a luxury. Yet instead of understanding your need for a break, they may express frustration about taking care of things alone on their “day off.”
I see the imbalance between your responsibilities and theirs. They receive praise for simply showing up, while you’re criticized for expressing a desire for a moment of silence after juggling countless responsibilities. I notice how you comfort your sick child, knowing full well it means more laundry, and how you make space for your partner to rest, even when you’re the one who needs it.
Maybe your parents have added to your stress. Perhaps your mom is constantly questioning your choices, or your dad remains distant. I see your struggles, but remember, you are not defined by their actions. You are so much more than that. You are better.
At times, the frustration may feel overwhelming—so much so that you might feel the urge to lash out. But you don’t; you’ve never crossed that line, and you never will. While you may fear that impulse, I see the calm strength that keeps you grounded.
It’s perfectly normal to dislike certain moments of motherhood. It’s even okay to feel anger towards your child occasionally. Love and frustration can coexist, just as you’ve learned from your own upbringing. Yet you are transforming that understanding into a nurturing environment for your child. When she can articulate her feelings, saying, “Mom, I love you, but I’m really mad at you right now,” you’re teaching her emotional resilience.
I see the weight you carry as you strive to raise a kind, brave child. But remember, you will falter. You’ll make mistakes, and your child will see them. Don’t hide from your errors; embrace them. Use those moments to teach her about growth and resilience, showing her that mistakes can lead to improvement.
Right now, you might be caught in a cycle of self-criticism. You’re exhausted and perhaps resentful, but here’s what you may not see: you and your child share an unbreakable bond that your partner cannot replicate. You, dear friend, are her truth.
I see the pride radiating from you when you say, “My kid is amazing.” And she is! Deep down, you know that you are a fundamental part of who she is becoming. I see you in her laughter, in her kindness, and in her determination to help others, whether it’s picking up toys or tending to a friend’s scraped knee.
I see your unwavering commitment to making her strong and resilient, even if it leaves little room for your own needs. But know this: you are doing an incredible job. Not only your best, but enough by anyone’s standards—and most importantly, enough by hers.
So, my dear friend, on this Mother’s Day, my wish for you is simple: may you find the clarity to recognize yourself as I see you—enough. And may you drift into a peaceful sleep wrapped in that knowledge.
As you navigate the journey of motherhood, remember that resources are available to help you along the way. For more insights on pregnancy and home insemination, check out this excellent resource from the American Society for Reproductive Medicine here. And if you’re interested in exploring more about at-home insemination, you can visit this post for helpful tips. For comprehensive information on creating a family, visit Make a Mom.
In closing, know that you’re not alone in this journey. You are seen, valued, and enough.