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The Case for a Weekend with Friends (Go for It, Mama!)
by Jamie Delaney
Updated: June 7, 2017
Originally Published: May 18, 2017
When you have little ones running around, it’s not uncommon for things to end up in peculiar spots. You might find the milk tucked away in a cupboard, leaving you shaking your head as you pour it down the sink. Foil can end up in the fridge, where it remains hidden behind the grapes for days. And who hasn’t discovered their cold morning coffee lingering in the microwave just before dinner?
But it’s not just misplaced items that pose a challenge. Things can also disappear entirely. Keys vanish without a trace, crucial documents get buried under a mountain of toys, and the moment you need a pencil, they seem to have vanished into thin air. Sometimes, even people go missing—like when someone accidentally lets the cat out, prompting an urgent neighborhood search.
When I first became a mother, my own mother shared a secret: whenever she needed a moment of peace, she would find a sunny spot on the floor between her bedroom and the window where we would never think to look for her. It was her little escape, and even though she could hear us calling for her, that small sanctuary allowed her to breathe and regain her composure.
As mothers, however, we often lose ourselves without realizing it. What happens when we become just “Mom” in a sea of daily demands? When we read so many children’s books that we forget our own taste in literature? When we focus on teaching our children the art of friendship but neglect to nurture our own friendships?
This is why I wholeheartedly support the idea of a weekend getaway with friends. A few hours away can be refreshing, but a few days can truly help us reconnect and replenish our spirits. While some may feel indulgent about leaving their family for a weekend, fearing the chaos that might ensue at home, I assure you, it can be a rejuvenating experience.
I was nervous about my first weekend away; I imagined returning to a disaster zone: wrappers on the floor, two messy kids, and a sink overflowing with dishes. Instead, I came home to a perfectly fine house, happy kids, and a husband who had put fresh paint on the wood beams outside (show-off!). Part of me wished he would struggle, just to understand the challenges of full-time parenting. He admitted it wasn’t easy, but he managed admirably.
While he was showcasing his skills, I had flown from Orange County, California, to Cabo San Lucas, Mexico, for a blissful three-night escape with my friends. With the right group of women, no one expects you to cook or play caretaker. You can enjoy your coffee in peace, lounge by the pool, and not worry about tying shoelaces or fetching tissues.
You’ll be reminded of your true identity—the hotel staff will call you by your name when you check in. You can relax on the beach, and the sand will stay there instead of invading your car and home. You might even find yourself on a slippery banana boat, laughing until your sides hurt as you try to climb back on after being tossed off.
Dinner becomes a leisurely affair, free from the stress of ensuring everyone eats their veggies, as you savor food you didn’t have to prepare. You’ll sleep soundly without little ones knocking on your door or crowding your bed. And if someone spills their drink, you won’t worry about cleaning it up later.
During this time, you’ll discover new things about your friends—like who loves to play Christmas music in the shower, or who has a secret talent for Canasta. You’ll listen deeply as one friend shares about her ailing mother, and you’ll have the time to offer her a hug and your support. You’ll indulge in reading whatever you like, drifting into your own world once again.
You’ll realize that while your children need you, they also can manage without you for a bit. You’ll return home with small mementos from your trip: tropical bath soaps, a few candies, and bracelets. Your kids will be thrilled to see gifts from afar, and everyone—your children, your partner, even the cat—will welcome you back with open arms.
Once you return, you’ll feel whole again. You’ll be Mom, sure, but you’ll also be you. You’ll check in on your friend, invite another over for a game, and find time to finish that book you started. You might even catch yourself humming a holiday tune in the shower, with your kids noticing the sparkle in your eyes. They’ll see you reading and curl up beside you with their own books. Life will feel vibrant again, and even if you occasionally find your coffee in the microwave, you’ll know exactly where you stand.
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Summary
In summary, taking a weekend away with friends can be a transformative experience for mothers. It allows for a much-needed break from the daily grind, giving moms the opportunity to reconnect with themselves and their relationships. By stepping away from responsibilities, mothers can rejuvenate and return home refreshed, ultimately benefiting both themselves and their families.