Wedding planning often feels like navigating a minefield of decisions—none of them life-altering, yet each one feels monumental. My partner and I opted for a buffet of eight different cakes because I simply couldn’t settle on just one. I told my bridesmaids to choose their own dresses—an attempt at being easygoing—which then saw me rejecting four of my sister’s picks (they were, quite frankly, hideous). Yet, amid all these choices, one decision stood out as a simple yes: we wanted to include kids in our celebration.
Kids at weddings can be absolutely adorable. As a bride and someone who may have been a bit starved for attention as a child, I wasn’t keen on being upstaged on my big day. If a distant cousin showed up in white, I might have launched one of my carefully chosen heels at her. But kids? They have a knack for stealing the spotlight, and I was all for it. With my charming little cousins and nieces around, one highlight was watching our flower girl dance with the groom while standing on his shoes—a memory I cherish.
I understand that not everyone is a fan of having kids at weddings. Weddings can be costly, and sometimes it’s necessary to limit the guest list for budgetary reasons. Plus, some folks are wary of that uncle who might indulge a bit too much and end up performing a questionable dance number. I get it—kids may not fit every wedding scenario.
However, when it works, it can be an absolute blast.
Now that my partner and I have kids ourselves, we face the dilemma of whether to bring them along to weddings when they’re invited. Our experiences with taking our 4-year-old son and 2-year-old daughter out in public have been a mixed bag. Long ceremonies, loud music, and late nights often lead to the thought: “Why did we think this was a good idea?” Especially since our son has special needs that make him sensitive to loud noises.
Recently, I spent weeks fretting over whether we should leave the kids with my in-laws while attending my cousin’s wedding a few hours away. Ultimately, we decided to take them with us. I prepped our devices with shows and games, packed a stroller for tired little ones, and stocked it with snacks and coloring books. I even remembered the hearing-protective earmuffs for my son.
We agreed that if things went south, we’d simply head back to the hotel and call it a night. Surprisingly, we made it through an entire Catholic mass without a hitch, thanks to the activity books I brought along.
As we arrived at the reception, I was unsure about how the evening would unfold. Both kids had fallen asleep in the car, and our son was understandably cranky upon waking. As I contemplated an early exit, I decided to feed them some dinner before leaving. We retreated to a quieter area, and I set out plates of macaroni and cheese from the barbecue buffet. Just as we were about to call it quits, trays of cookies appeared.
“See those cookies? If you let me put your earmuffs on, you can eat as many cookies as you want!” I said, knowing how much he adored sweets. Surprisingly, he chose only three cookies. After devouring them, he allowed me to put on his earmuffs.
I can’t express how grateful I am that we waited for our kids to eat before leaving. That cookie moment turned the night around. All four of us returned to the main reception area and hit the dance floor. My son joined a group of little cousins already dancing, and seeing their joy made all the earlier stress fade away. We spent the rest of the night enjoying each other’s company, capturing memories with videos and pictures. A flower girl even pulled my son in for a slow dance while my partner and I swayed together. It was truly magical.
Had we left our kids with their grandparents, we would have enjoyed a night of dancing and celebrating my cousin’s marriage. We would have packed lighter and had a break from nursery rhymes. But we would have missed out on one of my favorite parenting moments and, honestly, the cookies wouldn’t have tasted nearly as sweet.
Weddings are wonderful occasions filled with joy, love, and the people you cherish. I feel fortunate that our special day included our little ones, who brought even more happiness to the celebration.
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In conclusion, including kids in weddings can create beautiful memories, making the event even more special for everyone involved.