Your cart is currently empty!
The Most Essential Parenting Action You Can Take Today
A few years back, my father expressed his regret for being absent during my childhood. “I’m truly sorry for that,” he wrote. “I hope you always felt my love.” He didn’t need to elaborate; I understood perfectly. But there’s something else I remember vividly.
For over ten years, I walked across campus to visit my dad at his office after school. Each time, I found him surrounded by stacks of papers and books. While the empty chair next to him was likely meant for a colleague or student, I always felt it was reserved for me.
He would look up, smile, and without fail, cap the pen he was using. This simple gesture signaled that he was ready to listen. Sometimes I shared a little; other times, I rambled on about something exciting or troubling from my day. Dad was always engaged, nodding and smiling as if my stories were the highlight of his day.
This routine lasted from my early school years through high school, and I can’t recall a moment when he brushed me off, regardless of the pressures he faced. My father wasn’t perfect—he lost his temper, worked too long, and battled depression—but he always made time to hear me out.
Despite what some critics claim about undivided attention creating self-centered children, I believe that a parent who listens fosters a child who knows their voice matters. When children feel heard, they gain the strength to advocate for themselves, resist negative influences, and acknowledge their mistakes.
Now, as a parent of two wonderful daughters, I am committed to passing on my father’s invaluable gift of listening. Over the past decade, I’ve incorporated six impactful practices to reinforce my children’s belief in the importance of their voices. Here are those practices:
- Pause and Engage: When your child speaks, stop what you’re doing. By making eye contact, you show them their thoughts are important. If your schedule is hectic, designate a specific time, like bedtime, to focus on them. My older daughter started asking for “talk time” at night when she was three, and we still have that time together now that she’s twelve.
- Honor Their Words: Give them the space to articulate their thoughts, even if it takes time. Resist the urge to finish their sentences or correct them; simply listening strengthens their voice.
- Encourage Independence: Whenever possible, let your children speak for themselves, whether it’s to a coach or a customer service representative. I’ll never forget when my daughter confidently expressed her concerns in a parent-teacher conference, showing her ability to advocate for herself.
- Celebrate Their Expertise: Allow your children to take the lead in areas where they excel. Whether it’s remembering names or navigating a parking lot, acknowledging their skills boosts their confidence and encourages them to share their knowledge.
- Pause in Difficult Conversations: When your child shares something troubling, take a moment before responding. A simple acknowledgment of their trust can open the door for further dialogue and strengthen your relationship.
- Listen with Your Whole Being: Your child will eventually face tough situations where they can either remain silent or speak up. Your attentive listening now reinforces the idea that their voice is valuable, which can be life-changing.
Parenting is indeed challenging, filled with ups and downs. On the tough days, avoid labeling yourself as a failure. Instead, focus on one fundamental action: listening.
For more insights on building a strong relationship with your child, check out our other blog posts at intracervicalinsemination.com/blog/. Additionally, you can explore Make a Mom’s resources for fertility supplements to aid your journey. If you’re considering fertility treatments, March of Dimes offers excellent support and guidance.
In summary, the most vital parenting action you can take is to listen actively to your children. Creating an environment where they feel heard cultivates their confidence and ability to express themselves throughout life.