It all began with a persistent headache—a headache that lingered for four long days. Despite trying every remedy available, from coffee to both hot and cold showers, nothing provided relief. When I finally contacted my doctor, they dismissed my concerns, saying, “You’ve dealt with headaches before. There’s nothing to worry about.”
Then, in the stillness of the night, it happened. With a sudden “pop,” the pain vanished, replaced by a warm rush that coursed through my brain. Memories of a friend’s recent loss to a brain aneurysm flooded my thoughts, and panic set in. I shook my partner awake and urgently called for help.
As I curled up on the carpet, anxiously waiting for the ambulance, I could hear the dispatcher guiding me through the process. In a moment of frantic clarity, I asked my partner to record a message for our child, who was crying in her crib. “Hi sweetie, I’m your mama, and I love you so very much.” That night marked a turning point in my life—not because of the health challenges that followed, but because of a profound shift in my perspective.
Describing motherhood to someone untouched by it is daunting, yet I’ve heard it aptly put: having a child feels like a large piece of your heart is now roaming outside your body. As paramedics arrived, I realized that if those were my final moments, my child would never truly know me. She would only have remnants of my existence—photos, notes, and the stories told by others.
As the ambulance took me to the hospital, I pondered what those stories would convey. The realization that I wasn’t satisfied with the answer propelled me to change.
As a mother and an individual navigating life, I encourage you to reflect on what will be said about you after you’re gone. Are you compassionate? Are you patient? Are you generous? I am striving to be those things now.
You don’t need to feel proud of your past self to take pride in who you are today. Change can occur in an instant. By swapping out a negative thought for a positive one, you can transform your outlook on life. Surrounding yourself with positivity can unleash your best self. Assess your daily interactions, and if you see room for improvement, take action. It can be as straightforward as you decide to make it.
Recently, a friend visited and remarked, “You haven’t spoken ill of anyone during our time together.” I was taken aback. My initial thought was, “Of course not, why would I?” But then I remembered how easily I used to join in on gossip. Now, I realize that it’s far more rewarding to engage in meaningful conversations about ideas, beliefs, and experiences rather than tearing others down.
I don’t aim to preach; I’m just a flawed individual striving to create the best legacy possible. I hope you will too, because tomorrow isn’t guaranteed. I’m grateful for the chance to share this message: Live fully.
Put your phone down. Engage with those around you. Hold doors open. Smile at strangers. Express gratitude. Share compliments with others and with yourself. Love yourself. People might forget your appearance, but they will remember how you made them feel. So walk gracefully, speak confidently, love tenderly, and laugh heartily. Reach out to someone if they cross your mind, and allow yourself to celebrate not just others but your own happiness through every phase of life.
Life doesn’t need to be flawless to be fulfilling.
What do I want my child to remember about me? That I smiled, that I laughed, and most importantly, that I loved—with every ounce of my being. I hope the same will be said about you.
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Summary:
This article recounts a life-altering experience that shifted the author’s perspective on living fully and meaningfully. Reflecting on motherhood and the legacy one leaves behind, it encourages readers to embrace kindness, positivity, and genuine connections. The author emphasizes the importance of being present and loving, while also providing resources for those exploring family-building options.