I recently had a disagreement with a friend—one of those messy and frustrating arguments where you’re shouting, “Why won’t you LISTEN to me?” while your (soon-to-be former) pal interrupts and twists your words, making you sound foolish. The two of you are shouting over each other, hurling dramatic, hurtful comments, and the only way to stop the chaos is for one of you to hang up.
Enter Ship Your Enemies Glitter, a service that will send an envelope filled with glitter to anyone around the globe for just $9.99. I fully endorse this idea! When it comes to delivering the final blow in an argument, nothing quite compares to sending your opponent a tiny packet of what the site cheekily refers to as “the herpes of the craft world.” Instead of angrily hanging up or unfriending someone online, why not claim victory by ensuring that the person who wronged you will be cleaning sparkly dust out of their couch cushions for the foreseeable future?
Ship Your Enemies Glitter promises to include an anonymous note within the glittery chaos, explaining the reason for the delivery. In my case, it would read something like, “I’m sending this because you’re a colossal jerk and we’re no longer friends.” For those who struggle to express their frustrations—yes, I know you’re out there—this is a brilliant option. An envelope of glitter is direct, poetic, and definitely carries a hint of hostility, albeit in a playful My Little Pony sort of way. At $9.99, it may seem pricey for a handful of glitter, but it’s just the right amount to secure a clever and crafty victory.
So, to my adversaries, consider this your fair warning!
For more on keeping the peace and navigating relationships, you might also enjoy this insightful post about home insemination kits. And if you’re curious about the methods of insemination, be sure to check out this excellent resource on pregnancy and home insemination.
In summary, if you find yourself in a heated argument and want to deliver a unique—and glittery—message to your foe, consider sending them a packet of glitter. It’s a lighthearted yet effective way to assert your feelings. Just remember, a little sparkle goes a long way!