When my first child entered the world in 1991, parenting felt more like an improvised performance than a structured endeavor. We leaned heavily on three survival tools: 1) grandparents, 2) our sometimes wacky instincts, and 3) Bacardi wine coolers. Our generation had What to Expect the First Year as our go-to survival guide.
Fast forward to today, and I now have five children, spanning from my oldest, who is 22, to my youngest, who is almost three. It’s quite a leap from empty nesting to diving back into the chaotic world of diapers and late-night feedings.
Over the past two decades, parenting norms have shifted dramatically. Car seats are now designed with safety in mind, baby food has gone organic, and the old advice of “let them cry it out” has transformed. Who knew that dipping a pacifier in wine was now a big no-no?
Reflecting on the past, I realized that some of the soothing techniques we once used are now regarded as questionable, to say the least. Back then, we didn’t have the luxury of YouTube tutorials, countless self-help books, or rigorous safety testing to guide us. Instead, we relied on traditions passed down through generations.
Let’s take a lighthearted look at eight outdated baby-soothing methods that would likely raise eyebrows among today’s parents:
- Momentarily Unbuckling a Car Seat While Driving
If a baby was throwing a tantrum in the backseat, we’d sometimes unlatch them for a brief moment of freedom. We thought it would calm them down—what a concept! Back then, child passenger safety laws were just beginning to emerge, and we often took liberties that would make today’s parents gasp. - Using Bumper Pads in Cribs
We believed that bumper pads would protect our little ones from bumping their heads and getting stuck in the slats. However, we never considered the risks associated with those countless ties holding them in place. Nowadays, the American Academy of Pediatrics warns against them, so it’s best to skip this outdated practice. - Hanging Flimsy Mobiles Over Cribs
Those decorative mobiles were often more for our aesthetic pleasure than baby entertainment. They dangled precariously over our infants, with little safety in mind. Today’s options are much sturdier, often equipped with safety features. - Placing Babies on Their Bellies to Sleep
At the time, we thought belly-sleeping was just fine since there were no studies linking it to SIDS. Now, however, we know better. If Aunt Bertha insists on this method, kindly ignore her; science has made its case. - Relying on Crank Swings for Soothing
Baby swings from the past had two speeds: stillness and complete chaos. We had to crank them by hand to get some motion—talk about a workout! These swings were often more dangerous than helpful. - Picking Babies Up Immediately When They Cried
Back then, parents weren’t judged as harshly for their decisions. Some chose to scoop their crying babies up; others let them cry it out. Personally, I always opted for hugging and comforting my child, regardless of what others thought. - Using Infant Walkers Without Brakes
The design of infant walkers was a recipe for disaster. With no brakes, they allowed babies to zoom around at breakneck speed. Thankfully, we now have safer alternatives, like activity centers, which have been around since 1994. - Dabbing Whiskey on Teething Gums
This one is a head-scratcher! Back then, it was common to put a little whiskey on a baby’s gums for teething pain relief. Thankfully, we’ve learned that this is not a safe option; frozen washcloths are a much better choice.
Despite these questionable techniques, I’ve raised five healthy kids without any major incidents. While our old methods may have been unconventional, I’m grateful to see that today’s parents have access to better, safer solutions. Skip the butt fan and consider investing in a college fund instead—your child will appreciate it!
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Summary
This article humorously reflects on outdated baby-soothing practices from previous decades, highlighting how parenting techniques have evolved for safety and effectiveness. From unbuckling car seats to dabbing whiskey on teething gums, these methods reveal the shifts in parenting norms and emphasize the importance of modern safety measures.
