Is anyone trying to persuade you to let them be part of your birth experience? Are relatives simply assuming they’ll be welcomed? Stand your ground, mama. It’s time to take a stand.
When did we start believing that having an audience during labor was a good idea? As if the presence of medical staff isn’t awkward enough, let’s invite more people into the mix. After all, what’s a little more exposure after carrying a cup of urine through the doctor’s office? Clearly, pregnant women don’t need any boundaries, right? Wrong.
By the time your delivery day arrives, you might feel accustomed to being undressed and having various eyes on your body. However, that doesn’t mean you want your mother-in-law or even your own mother witnessing the process. You may find that some people assume they have a right to be present. The only person who should hold that privilege is the one who helped create this tiny human — and even that might be negotiable!
If labor is a show, you are the director, the producer, and the one holding the clipboard at the entrance. You call the shots! Never feel obligated to justify your decisions about who will be there. “Exposed vagina” should be explanation enough. In fact, why not place a humorous sign on your hospital door that says, “Keep Out: Exposed Vagina”? Just for a laugh, I even used Comic Sans—no one can accuse you of being rude in Comic Sans!
On a serious note, research shows that stress can prolong labor. In nature, when a laboring animal senses danger or disruption, the stress hormone catecholamine can inhibit labor to protect the baby. This applies to humans as well. If a woman feels unsafe or overwhelmed, her stress levels can rise, potentially slowing or halting labor. Therefore, it’s crucial to carefully select who will be around during your birthing experience. If someone adds stress, they shouldn’t be present as you work to bring your baby into the world.
Your friends and family might not stress you out; perhaps you simply feel uneasy about being so exposed. During labor, you may need to tap into your instincts, which could involve expressing yourself in various ways, including possibly losing control. You need to feel at ease to fully embrace the experience.
If your loved ones provide comfort and support, feel free to host a celebration in the delivery room or your home birth. But don’t hesitate to assert yourself if you have any doubts about someone asking to be there. Remember, you have every right to do so. Because, let’s face it, exposed vagina.
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In summary, it’s essential to prioritize your comfort during childbirth. You are the one in control, and you have every right to determine who is present for this deeply personal experience.