Currently, I find myself in a hotel room, unable to enjoy a day at the amusement park due to rain. This unexpected downtime allows me to reflect on the lessons learned from this family trip with my two kids, ages 7 and 5. If you’ve traveled with children, you might find some of these observations familiar:
- Forget the big attractions—kids find the most joy in simple pleasures. They can turn a sofa bed into a fortress or delight in bouncing from one hotel bed to another, even if it leads to a not-so-lucky tumble and a face plant into a less-than-clean comforter. The resulting “vacation scars” become epic tales of adventure.
- Despite your best efforts, kids often seem immune to the idea of hotel etiquette. “Please keep it down after 10 p.m.” falls on deaf ears when they’re in full-on play mode.
- Asking if they need the bathroom is futile. Child A will insist they don’t need to go, only to need it desperately moments later, at which point Child B will suddenly be on the verge of an accident. Just when you think Child A has finally vacated the throne, prepare for a lengthy “artistic” session that will leave Child B in anguish.
- Attempts to save money by avoiding overpriced games at amusement parks will likely be ignored. “We’ve spent a fortune on tickets!” is met with obliviousness as they beg for overpriced ring tosses.
- A day of indulgence can be fueled by little more than sugary sodas, neon cheese crackers, and a couple of bites from a giant pretzel.
- Your dining preferences? Forget it. Kids have a singular focus when traveling, and it’s typically McDonald’s.
- Expect at least one cherished toy to be mysteriously lost in the hotel room, necessitating a mad dash for a costly replacement.
- For some reason, the warning “Keep your fingers away from the elevator doors” is also overlooked.
- Fights will erupt over who gets to do almost anything, from opening the hotel door to choosing the next ride. Dad might feel a bit left out!
- Water fountains in hotel lobbies? Prepare for an adventurous exploration that involves hands where they shouldn’t be.
- The chaos of a free hotel breakfast buffet is legendary. It’s less about leisurely dining and more about survival in the face of a stampede for rubbery omelets.
- And the battle over who gets to push elevator buttons? Trust me, it’s a big deal.
- If rain interrupts your amusement park plans, expect to spend more than your ticket price in arcade games, only to face the heartbreak of a cheap prize breaking moments after it’s won. You’ll wish you had saved that cash for a nice, non-buffet breakfast.
- Did I mention kids are remarkably deaf to reason?
- Consider booking a hotel with a complimentary happy hour. You may find yourself enjoying less-than-decent drinks just to cope with the chaos, pairing them with burnt popcorn and stale snacks.
But then, just when you think you’ll never eat out again, you find yourself at a quaint restaurant. The kids behave beautifully, use their best manners, and even enjoy their meals. They’re entertained and content, and for a brief moment, the vacation feels worthwhile.
Until you reach the elevator, and the button-pushing debate starts all over again.
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Summary
Traveling with kids can be an adventure filled with unexpected lessons and humorous challenges. From the joy of simple hotel amenities to the chaos of mealtime, family vacations offer a unique blend of fun and frustration. Even amidst the chaos, there may be moments of calm that remind you why you take these trips in the first place.