“Life can be quite challenging, right?” my friend Clara texted me last week.
“Absolutely,” I replied.
We were trying to coordinate a get-together for the upcoming weekend. However, with the kids’ activities, travel plans, and various commitments, it felt like an impossible task. I miss Clara, and I know she misses me too. It’s disappointing. Life can be tough sometimes.
This morning, I was greeted by a series of mishaps: a leaking sink in the bathroom, a shower door that decided to detach itself, and my dog making a mess on Jackson’s piano book. Meanwhile, the other dog (or perhaps the same one?) had an unfortunate incident all over the living room, dining room, kitchen, and family room. Our morning was a whirlwind of rushing to drop the kids off at school, filled with hurried goodbyes. I found myself on the brink of tears for reasons I couldn’t quite pinpoint. Some days just feel heavy.
“Parenting can be overwhelming,” a friend texted me later in the day. “It feels like I’ve jumped off a parenting cliff without a plan.”
“I relate to that most days,” I replied.
The endless questions and uncertainties can be exhausting. Are they getting enough rest? Are we reading enough together? How old is too old for a favorite blanket or thumb-sucking? Should I allow my son to join the football team? Are they involved in too many activities, or not enough? With every new stage comes a fresh set of doubts. I often feel like I’m free-falling, and I can’t shake the feeling that I’m not measuring up. Parenting is tough sometimes.
Life itself—parenting, friendships, relationships, and work—can feel incredibly challenging. Sometimes, it’s all just hard.
I recognize that acknowledging life’s difficulties isn’t always popular. Society often prefers to portray struggles in hindsight, celebrating victories after overcoming adversity. We share stories of triumph, but what about the moments of struggle? When we’re still grappling with our challenges, it’s easy to feel isolated, as if no one else understands the chaos.
The truth is, some of the most meaningful aspects of life are the hardest. Parenting is undeniably challenging. Maintaining a marriage while raising children can be intricate, and nurturing friendships often feels awkward, especially with distance separating us. Simply being an adult can be daunting at times.
Life’s most beautiful elements—parenting, marriage, friendship—also have their gritty sides. Ignoring these realities doesn’t diminish their significance. Recognizing that life can be hard doesn’t lessen its beauty.
Each day, I’m reminded of the richness of life, even on the tough days. I’m grateful for my children, even when parenting feels like navigating a minefield. I cherish my husband, family, and friends, despite the everyday obligations that sometimes get in the way.
Tonight, Clara and I resumed our conversation about getting together. With a distance of about 1,000 miles and the everyday busyness of life, we both agreed that yes, life can be quite challenging. We acknowledged that it’s not always easy to admit when we’re struggling. We even discussed the possibility of a girls’ weekend soon.
“Noodle salad!” I texted, referencing a quote from a beloved movie. In As Good as It Gets, Jack Nicholson’s character describes how some people have picturesque stories filled with boats, lakes, and noodle salad. “Good times, noodle salad,” he says. I fondly remembered watching that film nearly two decades ago at my grandparents’ lake house, surrounded by boats, friends, and delicious food.
The reality is that life can be hard, but it can also be beautiful. There are times filled with sunshine and laughter, and other moments that feel heavy and challenging. Most of the time, it’s a blend of both. Perhaps the key is to find joy even when we feel like we’re falling off a cliff. Maybe it’s about savoring those moments—like enjoying noodle salad—even when the kids are demanding pizza. And by “noodle salad,” I mean indulging in cookie dough while sipping wine and sharing my struggles with a friend.
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Summary:
Life is a mix of challenges and joys, especially when it comes to parenting, relationships, and friendships. While it’s easy to focus on the struggles, acknowledging the hard moments can lead to deeper connections and appreciation for life’s beauty. Embracing both the tough times and the good times is essential for creating meaningful experiences.