Parenting
The New Mom Panic
At a recent baby shower, I found myself enviously watching a first-time mom unwrap her gifts. For a fleeting moment, I wished to step into her shoes and experience once more that exhilarating anticipation of impending motherhood. I reminisced about the days of teetering between the carefree life of a single woman and the profound commitment of becoming a mother. (But not teetering too much…because, you know…dilated vaginas.)
There’s an undeniable thrill in being a new mom. I longed to feel that rush of adrenaline again—the thrill of navigating uncharted waters, the joy of conquering new challenges, and the sheer pride that comes with it all. And oh, the baby gear! Where were these amazing toys and gadgets when I had my little one?
Then I remembered a particularly chaotic day at the pool.
When my daughter was just four or five months old, I bravely took her to the pool solo for the first time. We were having a blast until I noticed the skin around her eyes turning an alarming shade of red. She was rubbing her eyes and starting to fuss. Panic set in. As the mom, I felt the weight of responsibility crushing down on me. All those warnings I had heard during pregnancy about what could go wrong echoed in my mind, and I knew I had to act fast.
And by “act fast,” I mean I completely lost it.
In a flurry, I gathered our belongings and raced toward the car, dialing the pediatrician as I went. The nurse’s calm demeanor confused me. Didn’t she understand my baby was clearly experiencing a catastrophic allergic reaction or a waterborne illness that could leave her blind? Or worse, could it be cancer? I insisted on bringing her in immediately, and after some persuasion, she agreed to fit us into the schedule.
But as I drove, something felt off. Those rear-facing car seats really do a number on your peace of mind; I couldn’t see how my daughter was doing. What were those strange noises? Was she even breathing? Panic surged within me, and I dialed 911.
“911, what’s your emergency?”
“I’m on the side of the road, and I think my baby is having trouble breathing!”
“Okay, ma’am. Is your baby turning blue?”
“No.”
“Ma’am…”
“Yes?”
“Ma’am, is that your baby crying in the background?”
“Yes, that’s her.”
“Ma’am, if your baby is crying, that means she’s breathing.”
Okay, so maybe I was overreacting. Clearly, the situation wasn’t as dire as I had imagined. Surely, the pediatrician would confirm my fast actions had been for a serious issue.
“Doctor, I don’t know what’s wrong. Her eyes turned red suddenly, and she was upset. Does she have a severe allergy? Should I have gone straight to the ER? Will she be okay? Oh, the horror! Will she ever play the violin?”
“Looks like she just got a little sunscreen in her eyes. The redness is already fading. Next time, try zinc oxide; it’s less irritating.”
And that’s exactly why I’m relieved to no longer be a first-time mom.
I no longer go from zero to catastrophic scenario in seconds. Now it takes me a bit longer—maybe five minutes—but I usually manage to regain my composure before dialing emergency services. Experience has taught me that parenting rarely involves true emergencies, and it has honed my instincts to be more level-headed. My first-time mom instincts were filled with fears of rare diseases, freak accidents, and an exaggerated sense of danger lurking everywhere.
That expectant mother can have all the fancy baby gadgets. I’ll stick to my lightweight purse, secure in the knowledge that if my child is crying, she’s definitely breathing. And I’m also certain that no matter what diaper the new mom receives, it will soon start to smell like, well, you know what!
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In summary, while the first-time mom experience is filled with excitement and a fair share of panic, with time comes the ability to handle situations with greater calm.