Guide me, O Lord, as I navigate the challenges of potty training without oversharing every little detail online. May my joy at the sight of successful potty use or my frustration over inevitable accidents remain private, sparing my social media followers from the minutiae of our journey.
Dear God, grant me the wisdom to practice restraint, so that family and friends are shielded from the relentless updates about potty trips, mishaps, and the sticker charts that track our progress. Let these discussions be reserved for phone calls with doting grandparents, for surely, that is their purpose.
Bestow upon me the understanding, O Lord, that the only individuals who genuinely care about what kind of underwear my child is wearing are those with nefarious intentions. If any such individuals were to discover our lives through the dark corners of the internet, may a fierce honey badger emerge to defend us, for as we all know, honey badgers don’t care—they just act.
Help me, God, to pause before posting any pictures of my child on the potty, no matter how adorable her expression may be. Let me ask myself, “Would I want my privacy violated like this?” The answer should be a resounding no, as some might find it amusing when it is anything but.
Indeed, Almighty, remind me that bathroom time is a sacred and private experience. The subject of bodily functions is not something to be shared lightly, even if framed by the innocence of a toddler’s soft skin as opposed to a grown man’s hairy behind.
Lastly, Lord, allow me to view my child with clarity, seeing her not just as my little one, but as an individual with her own thoughts, feelings, and the right to privacy.
Hear my prayer, O Lord, and guide me away from foolishness. In Your name, I pray, eternally. Amen.
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