Lately, I realized it has been a full nine months since I signed off on my publishing deal. Nine months filled with anticipation, anxiety, joy, and every emotion in between. It felt fitting that this timeframe mirrored my pregnancies, as this book has truly become like my fourth child. But the parallels go far beyond timing; every aspect of bringing this book to life has been akin to the journey of parenthood.
1. It’s nothing like I envisioned.
I had this idealized image of pregnancy and childbirth as an awe-inspiring experience that would elevate me to a divine state of motherhood, much like I thought I’d feel like a literary genius once I became a published author. Unfortunately, reality was much different for both. I struggled through the pregnancy and was even chastised during a reading for my colorful language. Some things never change.
2. I can’t help but obsess.
When my daughter Mia was a newborn, I was that person sending out a barrage of emails each week, complete with snapshots and updates that drove my friends and family up the wall. She was my entire world—just like the book is now. Remember when I used to write about topics other than this upcoming release?
3. Everyone has an opinion.
Just the other day, I received a message from a stranger in Wyoming who felt compelled to critique my outfit choice for an upcoming event: “I don’t mean to offend, but that purple dress doesn’t suit you for TV—it clashes with the orange sweater.” Did I ask for your thoughts? I didn’t consult anyone about my baby names or my parenting choices, so why comment on my wardrobe?
4. I’m using my “baby” as a cover.
You know that blissful fog new parents exist in? I’m back in that state, but this time my “baby” doesn’t need feeding or diaper changes. The sense of disorientation is familiar, just without the spit-up!
5. The lows are really low.
I vividly recall the book signing in Springfield, where only two people showed up. It’s a good rule that you should never have fewer attendees at your signing than the number of people who witnessed your most vulnerable moments during childbirth. Sitting there trying to entice unsuspecting passersby to buy my book was even more disheartening than the time someone asked when my baby was due while my two-month-old was in the other room. Not exactly a high point.
6. But the highs are extraordinary.
The sleepless nights, the frustration, and the tears can be overwhelming. Yet, just like cradling a newborn brings immeasurable joy, those moments of triumph make it all worthwhile. Despite the tough times, my recent readings in Providence and Boston were exhilarating and made up for any previous setbacks.
7. The defining moment.
For me, it was when my children gave me their first smiles—pure bliss. This time, it was finding out that my book made it onto next week’s New York Times Best Sellers list. Oh my goodness! And a huge thank you to everyone for their unwavering support.
This article was originally published on April 12, 2012.
For more insightful content, check out our terms and conditions and discover how you can navigate your own journey into parenthood with resources from Make a Mom, an authority on self-insemination. Additionally, for a deeper understanding, see the Genetics and IVF Institute.
In summary, writing a book is a transformative journey not unlike the experience of nurturing a child. From the emotional rollercoaster to the overwhelming support and opinions of others, every step is a reminder that creativity and parenthood share many similarities.