As a parent, I’ve done my fair share of bizarre things, but slicing a single blueberry into quarters might just take the cake. The other day, while preparing a snack for my 17-month-old daughter, I found myself reaching for some organic blueberries. I plucked one from its packaging and, recalling a vague warning about blueberries being the same size as a toddler’s throat, I cut it in half. The thought of a half blueberry being a choking hazard sent me into a spiral of overthinking, and before I knew it, I had quartered the poor fruit.
As I looked at the minuscule pieces, I couldn’t help but burst into laughter, which, of course, caused my daughter to join in from her highchair. And thus began my quest to justify my blueberry slicing madness with some perfectly logical reasons that had nothing to do with my overactive imagination about choking hazards.
1. It’s excellent practice for when the time comes to cut peanut butter and jelly sandwiches into perfectly portioned quarters.
2. Every other fruit gets sliced, and we wouldn’t want our blueberry feeling neglected or bullied by the cantaloupe.
3. Cutting it open reveals the true color of the blueberry—green! (Who knew?)
4. Someday, you might find yourself performing “surgery” on your child’s first pet goldfish, and blueberries are a great way to hone those skills.
5. You want to avoid the dog choking on a half blueberry when your toddler decides to toss it aside in a fit of inexplicable rage.
6. Some blueberries might just contain little fortunes—believe it or not!
7. The Very Hungry Caterpillar could be lurking inside, and the last thing I want is my daughter accidentally biting into him. That would be a therapy session waiting to happen.
8. Those tiny gnomes in your pantry could be looking to kick off a soccer game in your cereal box, and a quartered blueberry is the perfect ball.
9. Blueberry juice has been known to possess magical knife-sharpening properties—yes, really!
10. After all, two hands, two feet—it only makes sense to match the pieces accordingly!
Feel free to keep this list on hand for any future blueberry cutting endeavors—it’s royalty-free!
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In summary, slicing blueberries into quarters might seem absurd, but with a dash of humor and creativity, it can turn into a delightful part of parenting. Plus, it helps to ensure that snack time is as safe and enjoyable as possible.