Updated: Aug. 21, 2023 | Originally Published: Dec. 16, 2012
I found myself on the couch, watching as my nephew built a towering Lego structure on the floor. “Careful there, buddy,” I said, as he reached for another block. I had envisioned a different kind of parenting experience years ago—one filled with hair braiding, tea parties, and heart-to-heart chats over makeup and fashion.
Now, with two energetic boys under my care, I’ve come to realize that motherhood is not what I originally imagined. I won’t be a mother to a daughter donning flowing skirts or a teenage girl navigating the ups and downs of adolescence. I won’t share the intimate moments that often come with raising a daughter—a piece of me sometimes grieves for that lost dream.
But despite this, I am a mom, and I am learning to embrace the beauty of raising boys. While I might not be braiding hair or offering fashion tips, I still have the opportunity for deep conversations about their dreams and fears. There may not be prom dresses in my future, but I can guide them through their first crushes and the complexities of relationships.
Motherhood might not encompass the glittery crafts and gown fittings I once imagined, but it is filled with hugs, late-night talks, and the ever-present hope that my kids feel loved and valued. Whether we’re constructing Lego towers or enjoying a movie night together, every moment is a chance for connection and support.
My parenting journey may not have included the activities I anticipated, but it has proven to be far richer than I could have ever expected. At the core of it all is a profound belief that these boys were meant to be mine, and I was meant to be theirs. There is a comforting grace in this understanding, and let’s be honest, glittery crafts can create quite the mess anyway. Plus, there’s something incredibly endearing about the unique art my boys create.
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In summary, being a mom to boys has reshaped my expectations about parenting, revealing a world of connection, joy, and unexpected grace. While it may not align with my initial visions, it is undoubtedly fulfilling in ways I never anticipated.