I haven’t watched that military film yet, and I probably won’t get around to it this year. It’s not that I don’t want to; I actually enjoy military-themed movies. Plus, I have a soft spot for military personnel. In fact, I’m married to the most incredible Apache pilot, whom I affectionately call “Hero” for his skills — and also because he often forgets where he’s going when we’re driving around.
Currently, he’s deployed overseas in the Middle East, making the whole experience feel a tad too real. This situation has got me reflecting on what I didn’t expect when I can’t reach my very own handyman, who’s 7,000 miles away for the next year.
1. Every little noise becomes a potential threat.
We have two children and two dogs. While two of them are caged at night, the moment you hear something rustling downstairs, your mind races. It’s not the kids, as they’ve taken refuge in your bed or on the floor. So, what do you do? If you’re like me, you arm yourself with a baseball bat, tiptoe to the door, flick on the light, and prepare to confront… your overly enthusiastic dog who has managed to escape and is now enthusiastically decorating the living room with the Christmas tree.
2. You might find yourself using superglue to fix your toilet.
Yes, you read that right. Let’s just say it’s been leak-free for three weeks now — I’m practically a plumbing expert!
3. Your children will choose the most inconvenient times to have their epic tantrums.
When your hands are already full, you might even find yourself kicking at them with your feet while trying to juggle the multitude of care package items you’re preparing to send overseas. And yes, people will glare at you for it. Don’t judge; it happens.
4. Prepare for unsolicited and intrusive questions about your partner’s deployment.
You’ll find yourself crafting creative answers because you’re tired of explaining, “I can’t disclose that.” You’ll hear, “It must be so tough having him away for a year!” Yes, it’s hard, thanks for the reminder. I manage because I love him, and I support his commitment to our country, despite the challenges it brings.
5. You’ll become a care package crafting guru.
Even if you’re not particularly artistic, the need to send something more than ramen noodles will spark your creativity. I typically panic in craft stores, but for Hero, I might just create a glitter masterpiece to lift his spirits. Eight more months to go!
6. You may find yourself making a late-night trip to the emergency room.
Convinced you’re on the brink of death, spoiler alert: it could just be a nasty stomach bug that has you feeling like you’re dying.
7. Friends will promise support while they’re tipsy at his farewell party.
But when deployment starts, they seem to vanish. They’ll likely reappear just in time for the welcome home bash, though.
8. Snow. Lots of it.
When you’re alone and your husband is deployed, the weather turns into a blizzard, and you’ll have to shovel the driveway while feeling under the weather yourself. Meteorologists, in their excitement, will even start naming snowstorms, just to add to your stress!
9. You develop an unexpected obsession with video calls.
Since seeing your spouse’s face during deployment relies on these calls, you’ll learn to ignore your own bedhead when they call at midnight — which is the only time they can reach out.
10. Above all, you learn to have faith.
Sometimes days go by without communication, and the only thing that keeps you grounded is the hope that no one will knock on your door with news you dread. As dangerous as it is for troops abroad, chances are your partner is safe, probably just trying to clean off the glitter from their care package.
I’m sure I’ll uncover even more surprises during this deployment year. Likely, I’ll figure them out on the fly when a sudden plumbing issue arises, and I resort to using my best bed sheets to stem the flow. While I don’t enjoy the fact that I can’t hug Hero for another 343 days, I’m grateful to call him mine.
And let’s not forget, he’ll be in charge of the cat litter box for the entire first year after he returns!
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Summary
Navigating life while your partner is deployed can be both challenging and enlightening. From unexpected household repairs to the joys of care package crafting and the emotional ups and downs, it’s a journey that tests your resilience and creativity. With faith, support, and a little humor, you can make it through even the toughest days apart.