Last week, while browsing the grocery store, a headline from the latest issue of a popular magazine caught my attention: “Why Do So Many Cartoon Mothers Disappear?” This is a question I’ve pondered many times, but the article took an unexpected angle. The author suggested that the absence of mothers in films allows fathers to assume dual parenting roles, implying that mothers aren’t essential after all.
While that argument was intriguing, it was the comments section that resonated more with me. Many readers pointed out that killing off mothers in stories serves as a powerful narrative catalyst. After all, if mom is around, there’s little room for adventure or risk. This led me to a series of whimsical thoughts: Why couldn’t these mothers just go on a vacation, like in Don’t Tell Mom the Babysitter’s Dead? Or stay normal-sized, while their kids are shrunk down to the size of Cheerios, as in Honey, I Shrunk the Kids? I’m just glad I could weave in some nostalgia from my own childhood favorites.
I generally approach life with a positive outlook and don’t dwell on the concept of death. After all, the uncertainty of life makes worrying about it rather pointless. Yet, I can’t help but notice the prevalence of death in children’s narratives. This theme hits home more than ever, as I contemplate what it might be like for my daughter to grow up without a mom, and how that might unfold in her life.
Statistically speaking, she may very well find herself in what is often referred to as The Lost Mothers Society. This term was popularized by a well-known figure who lost her mother at a young age, suggesting that only those who experience such a loss before turning 20 qualify for this “club.” Surprisingly, this notion offers a small comfort — my daughter will not be alone in her experience. There’s even a documentary that delves into this topic, which was recently released on HBO. She’ll find camaraderie with others who share her misfortune, just as I have connected with fellow travelers on my unique journey.
I hope this doesn’t sound overly grim. After spending considerable time reflecting on life and mortality, I’ve chosen to focus on enjoying the moments I have rather than wallowing in negativity. My primary concern is how my situation will affect my daughter. So please understand that my intention is not to seek sympathy; rather, I’m looking to storytellers from Disney and Pixar for inspiration. I long for narratives where children face challenges and emerge stronger and more independent.
I recognize that my little girl isn’t a cartoon fish, deer, or mermaid. Real children shouldn’t have to experience the loss of their mothers or fathers. But if it must happen, why can’t they embark on magnificent adventures, discover their independence, unlock their potential, and find lasting happiness in the end? I don’t think that’s an unreasonable expectation.
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Summary
The article reflects on the common trope of absent mothers in children’s stories and how it impacts the narrative experience. The author contemplates the implications of parental loss, particularly in relation to their own daughter. They express a desire for more uplifting stories that inspire resilience and joy in the face of adversity.