Ah, the awkward phase. For many of us, it was a time filled with uncertainty and cringe-worthy moments. Looking back at old photos from when I was 13 is a workout for my cringe muscles. Seriously, those images nearly make me want to upchuck! Okay, maybe that’s a bit of an exaggeration, but you get the point.
During my most awkward years, I sported a bad perm, thick glasses, and a wardrobe that would make a middle-aged woman proud. Not much has changed since then, right? I distinctly remember having crushes on boys who clearly saw me as the least appealing option. I often felt the heavy weight of my lunch tray as I wove through a cafeteria filled with the “cool kids,” desperately trying to fit in.
The frizzy hair, acne, and the general sense of dread during those years were overwhelming. But here’s the twist: those painfully awkward moments actually shaped my character. The discomfort forced me to dig deep and discover strengths within myself that continue to support me through life’s challenges. We all know people who seemed to glide through their younger years without any struggle—they’re often the ones grappling with adulting in ways that catch them off guard. Let’s be honest, navigating adversity is tough if you’ve never faced it before.
During this challenging phase, I learned empathy, as I became all too familiar with the feeling of being left out. I found my sense of humor, because honestly, a good laugh is way better than a good cry. I honed my instincts and developed a keen sense of what feels genuine. I also unearthed hidden talents that had nothing to do with my appearance—thank goodness for that!
Despite the trials of those years, I have no desire to shield my children from their own awkward phases. In fact, I welcome it. I want them to experience their own epic journeys of self-discovery. As Winston Churchill famously advised, “If you’re going through hell, keep going.” I made it out on the other side and discovered the wonders of tweezers and contact lenses along the way.
Now, I have a daughter who possesses a delightful charm that turns heads wherever we go. Recently, while walking through our gym, we caught the attention of a water aerobics class, causing a momentary hush. The instructor later approached me, saying, “Your little girl is breathtaking! I lost my train of thought just watching her.”
I appreciate the compliment, but my daughter remains blissfully unaware of her beauty. She’s a lively, intelligent child, full of charisma, knowing her colors and shapes, and recognizing numbers and letters. Yet, it seems that her beauty often overshadows her other qualities. “But she’s clever too!” I insist. “And funny!” Sadly, those words often fall on deaf ears; people are too entranced by her bright eyes and adorable dimples—and I can’t blame them, I’m drawn in too.
I want all three of my children to cultivate strong character. I hope they realize they have so much more to offer the world than what meets the eye. I want them to feel confident knowing that if they can survive the trials of adolescence—like awkward body changes and harsh teasing—they can also navigate the rejections and challenges of adulthood. I want them to be kind, having experienced the sting of cruelty firsthand, and to understand the rollercoaster of feeling on top of the world one moment and crashing down the next.
The awkward phase is a crash course in life lessons, often delivered with a side of discomfort. It’s painful, yes, but the growth that comes from it is undeniably worth it. Bring on the headgear!
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Summary
The awkward phase is a transformative period that shapes character and resilience. Embracing discomfort can lead to profound personal growth, empathy, and a better understanding of oneself and others. While it’s tempting to shield our children from these experiences, allowing them to navigate their own awkward moments can help them build strength and confidence for the future.