How to Prepare Dinner with a Toddler in 100 Steps

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Cooking dinner with a toddler can feel like an epic adventure. Here’s a lighthearted guide to making it happen without losing your sanity.

  1. Let your little one know it’s time to make dinner.
  2. Suggest they play with their toy kitchen while you cook.
  3. Enthusiastically say, “I’m going to make something delicious! Want to pretend to cook too?”
  4. Quietly thank the universe when they show interest.
  5. Begin your cooking process.
  6. Scrub the potatoes clean.
  7. Fill a pot with water to boil.
  8. Smash some garlic.
  9. Bring the water to a boil.
  10. Ask your toddler if they want to boil water in their toy kitchen too.
  11. Remind them that pretend water works just as well as real water.
  12. Ask your toddler to take a deep breath.
  13. Since they’re still bouncing around, suggest they grab a safe, BPA-free cup to get some real water.
  14. Emphasize to only fill it a little.
  15. Realize that telling them to pretend to boil water might not have been the best idea.
  16. Retrieve the protein from the fridge.
  17. Spot your toddler eagerly filling their cup from the water dispenser.
  18. Offer assistance.
  19. Gently remind them that we don’t hit at home.
  20. Stand back as they shout, “I. DON’T. NEED. HELP!”
  21. Watch in disbelief as water spills everywhere.
  22. Bite your tongue instead of saying, “I told you so.”
  23. Attempt to console your overwhelmed toddler.
  24. Dash upstairs for a towel.
  25. Race back for an even bigger towel.
  26. Clean up the mess, maneuvering around your toddler who’s still on the floor.
  27. Ask how you can help them feel better.
  28. Inform them that no lollipops are allowed before dinner.
  29. Remind them that scratching isn’t nice.
  30. Notice a small scratch on yourself and gently remind them, “Look, you hurt Mommy/Daddy.”
  31. Let your toddler softly touch your face as they apologize, “Sorry Mommy/Daddy. Can I have a lollipop now?”
  32. Hand over the bag of lollipops and let them pick one.
  33. Explain that there are no blue lollipops left.
  34. Expect a “Why?” from your toddler.
  35. Remind them that they devoured all the blue ones yesterday.
  36. Clarify that you can’t go get more now because you’re cooking.
  37. Reiterate that throwing lollipops is not allowed in your home.
  38. Try to change the subject to lighten the mood.
  39. Ask if they’d like to help set the table.
  40. Watch them dash to the cutlery drawer.
  41. Season the protein while they grab forks.
  42. Preheat the oven.
  43. Praise them for setting the forks nicely.
  44. Ask them to fetch the napkins.
  45. Quickly rearrange the forks while they’re distracted.
  46. Turn around just in time to see them noticing your adjustments.
  47. Hold your breath as they march toward you.
  48. Remind them again that silverware should not be thrown.
  49. Duck to avoid flying forks.
  50. Comfort your toddler.
  51. Ask if they can help clean the forks up.
  52. Thank them for their assistance.
  53. Offer them a tissue.
  54. While they fetch a tissue, quickly fold any napkins that fell during the chaos.
  55. Add the potatoes to the boiling water.
  56. Ask if they’d like to watch a favorite show.
  57. Explain you can’t play outside since you’re cooking.
  58. Suggest another cartoon to keep them entertained.
  59. Wonder why you can’t have a toddler who just enjoys watching TV.
  60. Invite them to help dry lettuce in the salad spinner.
  61. After five minutes, tell them the spinner needs a break.
  62. Let them taste the lettuce.
  63. Remind them that spitting isn’t acceptable.
  64. Ask them to clean up the lettuce they spat out.
  65. Realize you probably shouldn’t have mentioned napkins again.
  66. Watch as they stomp over to the table.
  67. See them notice the napkins already laid out.
  68. Observe as they crumple each napkin and toss it on the floor.
  69. Ask if they feel better now.
  70. Comfort them again.
  71. Apologize for putting out the napkins and say, “Mommy/Daddy made a silly mistake.”
  72. Gently pat their back.
  73. Suggest they place the crumpled napkins back on the table.
  74. Watch as they carefully place each one back down.
  75. Rinse the cucumbers and tomatoes.
  76. Slice them up.
  77. Ask if they want to help with the mashed potatoes.
  78. Hope they say no.
  79. Put on a fake smile when they eagerly say yes.
  80. Help them drag a chair to reach the counter.
  81. Caution them about the hot potatoes.
  82. Gather the milk and butter.
  83. Get the potato masher ready.
  84. Strain the potatoes and place them in a mixing bowl.
  85. Let your toddler help mash the hot potatoes.
  86. Ask if you can have a turn.
  87. Warn them they have one minute left.
  88. Let them know that time’s up.
  89. Threaten to count to three if they don’t give you the masher.
  90. Count slowly to three.
  91. Comfort your toddler while you finish mashing.
  92. Mix in milk and butter.
  93. Continue to soothe them as you season the now lukewarm mashed potatoes.
  94. Allow your toddler to add a bit of extra salt—okay, a lot of extra salt.
  95. Toss the salad.
  96. Call the rest of the family down for dinner.
  97. Give them a stern look when they question the crumpled napkins and cold mashed potatoes.
  98. Realize, with horror, that you forgot to cook the protein.

Cooking with a toddler is no small feat, but with patience and a little creativity, it’s an experience filled with laughter and love.

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