As a parent, it can feel overwhelming to navigate the endless advice from mainstream parenting magazines that often make you second-guess your instincts. I’ve come across various articles that suggest what you shouldn’t say to your kids, and frankly, some of it is just plain ridiculous. Here’s my take on what these publications advise against and why I think you should ignore their guidance.
-
“Awesome Job!”
Encouraging phrases like “Good job!” every time your child accomplishes something can supposedly make them reliant on external praise rather than developing internal motivation. Instead, they suggest you offer specific feedback, such as “I really liked how you assisted your teammate.” But in reality, when my little one does something that deserves recognition—even if it’s merely figuring out how to tie her shoes—I’m going to shout “Awesome job!” while I chase my toddler who’s trying to eat the cat’s food. -
“Practice Makes Perfect.”
While practice does help improve skills, this phrase can create undue pressure. Instead, focus on celebrating hard work and personal growth. But let’s be real: kids are smart enough to know that every athlete has to practice to get better. I mean, are we really expecting them to think that a little more practice will magically transform them into a superstar? -
“You’re Fine.”
When your child scrapes their knee and starts crying, rushing to assure them they’re okay may seem dismissive. Instead, acknowledge their feelings with something like, “That looked like a tough fall.” But honestly, I think telling them they’re fine can actually reassure them. Kids face bumps and bruises constantly; sometimes, they just need a subtle reminder that they’ll bounce back. -
“Hurry Up!”
It’s easy to get frustrated when your child is taking their sweet time getting ready. Parenting magazines suggest you soften your language to “Let’s hurry,” which sounds great in theory. But when you’re running late for work, sometimes “Hurry up!” slips out. Let’s face it, they need to learn how to respond to time constraints, and that means they’ll hear “hurry up” from time to time. -
“I’m on a Diet.”
If you’re focused on healthy eating, be careful how you phrase it around your kids. Instead of discussing dieting, focus on positive eating habits. However, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with teaching them about balance and moderation. As long as we keep the conversation healthy, a little honesty won’t hurt. -
“We Can’t Afford That.”
While it’s tempting to say this when a child asks for something expensive, it might make them feel insecure about family finances. Consider expressing that you’re saving for something more important instead. But honestly, if you can’t afford it, just say it! Teaching kids about budgeting can be valuable life lessons. -
“Don’t Talk to Strangers.”strong>
This phrase can be confusing for kids. Instead, use specific scenarios to help them navigate interactions with unfamiliar people. However, I think it’s also essential to ensure kids know the difference between friendly strangers, like a police officer, and those who may not have good intentions.
-
“Be Careful.”strong>
Telling your child to be careful while they’re climbing can actually increase the likelihood of a fall. Instead, it’s suggested to provide support quietly. I get the idea, but sometimes a little caution is necessary, especially when you have a daredevil child like mine who thinks she’s invincible.
-
“No Dessert Unless You Finish Your Dinner.”strong>
Using this phrase can make dessert seem more desirable and diminish the enjoyment of the meal. Instead, just state, “First dinner, then dessert.” But if they don’t eat anything, you can bet I’ll be pulling out every trick in the book to encourage them to finish their meal!
-
“Let Me Help.”strong>
While it’s tempting to jump in when your child struggles with a task, giving them space to figure things out fosters independence. Instead, try guiding them with questions. But with three kids, I often find myself saying, “You better clean that up before dinner,” because let’s be real, sometimes I just need them to finish what they started!
In conclusion, parenting advice can often feel overwhelming and impractical. What works for one parent may not work for another. Embrace what resonates with you and your family, and remember that every parent has their own unique style. If you’re interested in exploring more about home insemination, check out this helpful post. For authoritative information on home insemination kits, makeamom.com has great resources. Additionally, if you’re curious about fertility insurance, UCSF’s FAQ can provide excellent insights.