As I prepare for my child’s fifth birthday, I can’t shake the feeling that raising a five-year-old today is far more complex than I ever imagined. Reflecting back, I remember being five in 1984, and it seemed like a much easier time for parents. While motherhood has never been a walk in the park, the challenges of today can feel overwhelming. I find myself envying the simplicity of parenting in 1984, particularly because our mothers didn’t have to contend with the internet, which seems to be the source of many of my parenting anxieties.
1. Streaming Services
When we first jumped on the Netflix bandwagon, I thought it would be a game-changer. Now, I’m convinced it’s a double-edged sword. My son, Max, has become obsessed: “Mom, can we watch it on Netflix? Is it on your phone? Can I see it on my tablet?” The instant gratification of streaming only amplifies his impatience. “Why isn’t it working? Is there no WiFi?” Just the other night, he barged into my room while I was watching TV. “Are you watching Netflix?” “Nope.” “On Demand?” “Nope.” “What are you watching?” “Just TV…” Explaining why some shows are available on Netflix while others are not? Not my idea of fun. In 1984, my choices were simple: watch whatever was on (usually something I didn’t care for) or play outside. So much easier!
Plus, thanks to Netflix, we’ve now been reacquainted with the infamous Caillou. Our mothers never had to deal with that!
2. Social Media
Enter Facebook, a minefield of parenting comparisons. When I see Julie posting pictures of her child’s arts and crafts, I’m suddenly bombarded with guilt for not having a sensory table for Max. And when I spot Mary’s photos from the zoo while I’m stuck at work, I can’t help but wonder when was the last time I took Max to the zoo. I rush to renew our membership, promising to visit more often, only to forget once the next zoo pic pops up.
Then there are the endless posts about healthy meals that make me feel inadequate for serving pizza three nights in a row. The constant stream of “shoulds” and “shouldn’ts” from other moms can be overwhelming: “Don’t feed your kid this!” or “My child would never watch…” Our mothers didn’t have to navigate this constant barrage of information. They simply lived in the moment without the pressure to measure up.
3. Crafting Overload
Pinterest has become a rabbit hole of guilt. Back in 1984, our moms didn’t have to see what other parents were doing or how they could turn cookies into reindeer. Now, I scroll through endless pins of creative crafts and DIY projects that I know will never come to fruition. Instead of feeling inspired, I often find myself feeling inadequate as a mother and a homemaker.
4. Information Overload
Google has turned parenting into a game of panic and paranoia. I can’t help but Google every little thing, making me hyper-aware of every possible ailment. A simple rash? Could be the bubonic plague! Max’s pediatrician recently advised me, “Just don’t Google. Call me instead.” I wasn’t alone; my sister had a similar chat with her doctor. The internet has fueled anxieties our mothers didn’t experience.
5. The Free-From Craze
I spend half my time worrying about whether everything is non-toxic, BPA-free, dye-free, and hormone-free. I analyze everything, from creams to toys, while my partner, Jake, just looks for labels that say “FREE.” While this vigilance is a positive step, it can also be maddening. People love to weigh in: “Are you gluten-free?” “I don’t know… should I be?” The constant cycle of adding and removing products based on the latest trends leaves me questioning everything.
In 1984, my parents had none of this anxiety. I can’t recall my dad ever reading a label—everything was just “fine,” and I’m still here, right?
In conclusion, while parenting has evolved in many ways, the simplicity of earlier times often seems like a distant memory. Our mothers faced their own challenges, but the relentless nature of modern parenting, fueled by technology and social media, can feel like a heavy burden at times.
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