From the moment we enter the world, we undergo a series of measurements, weighed against an abstract standard of what’s deemed “normal.” We find ourselves plotted on charts, assessed, and categorized—our identities reduced to numbers. The space between “you” and this elusive normal often becomes a lifelong journey, where we drift away from our true selves in pursuit of an ideal we believe we should embody.
Regardless of our own desires, society pushes us toward conformity. Parents, teachers, and even friends often impose their expectations, leading us to either fit in or feel inadequate. If our results don’t align with the established norms, there’s an unspoken pressure to “fix” whatever is perceived as flawed. It’s only a matter of time before we start feeling that something is wrong with us.
A doctor might point to a solitary mark on a growth chart, saying, “You’re here, but ideally, you should be here.” Such comparisons can leave us feeling diminished. We often equate our self-worth with these results, adjusting our self-image to fit external standards. Yet, we are not defined by numbers or by how others perceive us. The truth is, we’re all navigating life with our unique experiences and challenges, and the myth of a universal normalcy can be damaging.
We tend to measure ourselves against others, mistakenly believing they have the blueprint for how to live. This leads to an endless cycle of comparison, where we silently assess our own “normal” against what we observe in those around us. Unfortunately, this external focus can make us feel isolated and inadequate, as our personal journeys remain hidden from view.
Honesty is a rare venture; many fear judgment and criticism, often feeling that their struggles are theirs alone. To conform to a standard of normalcy is to deny the rich diversity of the human experience. In reality, there is no absolute normal. Our differences are what make us human, and embracing these variations is where true normalcy lies.
In the quest for understanding, it’s essential to recognize that we are not all the same. We are complex, nuanced, and beautifully different. The only universal truth in being human is that our differences are indeed our strengths.
(As an interesting note, Amanda is currently working on a non-fiction book centered on Anxiety and Difference, from which much of this material is derived.)
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Summary
We often find ourselves measuring against an abstract idea of normal, leading to feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt. Society’s push for conformity can overshadow our individuality. Embracing our differences is essential, as true normalcy exists in the rich variety of human experiences.