In my journey with “The Girl’s Guide to Absolutely Everything” (Workman, new edition 2015), I sought insights from countless women about the lessons they wish they had learned before graduating from college, insights that could have alleviated some heartaches and eased their transitions into adulthood. Here’s one remarkable perspective.
Name: Sophia James
Age: 32
Location: Brooklyn
Profession: I’m the features editor at Eater.com, currently spearheading the launch of the site’s narrative and longform journalism initiative. Additionally, I contribute as an editor for Saveur, a food and travel magazine, where I previously held the position of executive digital editor. I co-authored Saveur’s cookbook, The New Classics, and I also write about various non-culinary subjects for platforms like Medium, Refinery29, and The Hairpin.
What’s a key lesson you’ve learned?
I wish I had realized how freeing endings can actually be. Before I graduated, I had never experienced a breakup or left a job. However, within ten months of venturing into the real world, I faced both challenges in a span of two weeks. At just 22, I thought I would marry my boyfriend and that my job was my forever gig. After losing both, I felt certain that I was destined to be alone and unemployed; it felt like the end of everything.
But here’s the truth: endings can also be liberating. Through a mix of introspection, prompted by circumstance, and some incredible therapy, I discovered so much about myself in the months following that tumultuous time. I learned about what truly makes me happy and what I genuinely desire from life.
A decade later, those revelations continue to drive me. I have endured more breakups and transitioned from various jobs—each time still painful but with a greater understanding that it’s not the end of the world. Yes, it’s scary and emotional, and yes, there are tears, but I wish I had known earlier that you can navigate through these experiences. You remain true to yourself, seeing the world through your unique perspective, and you often emerge stronger than before.
This is part of a series highlighting other women’s advice for navigating your twenties. For more enlightening stories, visit our blog and check out Make a Mom for expert insights on home insemination. Additionally, for a comprehensive understanding of intrauterine insemination, explore this excellent resource.
In summary, remember that life’s endings can lead to new beginnings, and while the journey may be fraught with challenges, it ultimately shapes who you are and what you want from life.