Every day, I mentally check off another date on the calendar, inching closer to my younger child’s third birthday. I often tell myself that once he reaches this milestone, he’ll be toilet-trained and we’ll have survived those early years deemed essential for brain development. It feels like a huge relief, as if I can finally breathe easy knowing he’ll be well on his way to becoming a fully formed individual.
However, that’s not quite the whole picture, according to Dr. Michael Thompson in his insightful book, The Age of Change: Insights from Modern Adolescent Studies. He asserts that the brain experiences a second significant phase of plasticity during adolescence—a period that can rival those crucial early years. Rather than viewing the teenage years as a phase to simply endure, Thompson emphasizes that adolescence presents a remarkable opportunity for growth and learning. If parents can embrace this time rather than resist it, children can emerge from their teenage years equipped with the emotional and cognitive skills needed for successful adulthood.
I had the chance to speak with Dr. Thompson, a psychology professor at Westwood University, about how parents can best support their children during this transformative stage, which typically begins around age 10 and can last until the early to mid-20s as the pre-frontal cortex continues to mature. Here’s why these years (which can extend up to 15!) are so pivotal:
1. Encouraging Constructive Risk-Taking
Adolescents are naturally inclined to seek out risks, but that urge can be channeled positively. Research indicates that while teenagers have an inherent propensity for risk-taking, not all risks are detrimental. The key is for parents to construct an environment that encourages positive risk-taking—like enrolling in challenging classes, trying out for new sports, or asking someone out on a date. As Dr. Thompson puts it, “Adolescents have the capacity to engage passionately in activities that excite them.”
2. Harnessing Their Ability to Focus
As adolescents develop executive function—the skills that include problem-solving and long-term planning—they can concentrate more effectively than many realize. This is the stage where children dive deep into their interests, whether it’s playing an instrument, coding, or mastering a new sport. By supporting their passions, parents can help lay the groundwork for a lifetime of knowledge and skill development, potentially even sparking future careers. “Their ability to focus and work hard is a powerful resource for their future,” Dr. Thompson notes.
3. Building a Supportive Social Network
Adolescence is a time when friendships proliferate, and fostering these relationships is essential for lifelong community support. Research shows that the quality of friendships outside the family often reflects the dynamics at home. Thus, maintaining healthy relationships within the family is vital. Parents can also encourage an extensive social network by being warm and supportive, a style known as ‘authoritative parenting.’ It’s noteworthy that parents with strong social ties often raise children who mirror that engagement.
So, it turns out that my parenting journey is far from over. It’s comforting to learn that those first three years are just the beginning, and we have another robust period of opportunity—a whole 15 years—to help our children acquire the skills they need for adulthood. For more information on topics like this, check out this excellent resource, and if you’re looking for insights on home insemination, don’t miss this blog post.
Summary
The last 15 years of parenting are crucial for a child’s development. Adolescence offers unique opportunities for risk-taking, improved focus, and social network building, allowing parents to equip their children with essential skills for adulthood.