Thanksgiving is upon us, and if you’re like me, you’ve hosted more than your fair share of feasts over the years. This year is no different, and as you prepare for your family gathering, it’s essential to recognize the nine types of Thanksgiving guests who are bound to test your patience.
After all, it’s 2020, the era of gluten-free stuffing and organic everything. As you gear up for the holiday, you’ve probably already received some dietary requirements: Lisa is allergic to gluten, Tom is a strict vegetarian, and Aunt Carol is now on a keto diet. You thought you’d simply set the table, order a turkey, and whip up some mashed potatoes? Think again! Here’s your handy guide to navigating the quirks of your Thanksgiving crew.
1. The Fitness Fanatic
This is often your health-conscious sister-in-law who, upon arriving, immediately requests a running route for her morning jog. As she watches you juggle preparations for twelve guests, her barrage of questions begins: “Where did you source that turkey? Is it organic?” I mean, do they even grow turkeys locally?
2. The Watchful Mother
More often than not, this is your mother-in-law (not mine!). She’s decided that her role now is to observe and critique your every move in the kitchen. With her barrage of suggestions, like “Why not use a playpen for the baby while you cook?” you can’t help but wonder how you survived Thanksgiving before.
3. The Plant-Based Guest
You know you have one of these on the guest list, likely your teenage niece who has embraced veganism. Her mother calls ahead to inform you that “Suzy’s food must not contain any animal products.” Thanks for the heads-up; I’m sure almond milk will do wonders in mashed potatoes.
4. The Social Drinker
Let’s be honest, if you have a dozen guests, there’s bound to be a “fun Uncle Joe” in the mix. While you’re at the stove, one child strapped to your back, you can’t help but watch as he downs a whiskey and gives your toddler a wild ride.
5. The TMI Aunt
This relative is the life of the party—or at least she thinks so. Your well-meaning aunt bombards you with the gory details of her recent health issues, leaving you to wonder why she can’t share something less cringe-worthy.
6. The Early Bird Eater
Meet your dad or granddad, who simply can’t wait until the food is served before diving in. It’s reached the point where you have to prepare a mini turkey just to keep him occupied while you finish the real feast.
7. The Allergy Advocate
This guest, often accompanied by a parent, seems to have allergies to just about everything. Requests for new pillows and a pet-free zone become the norm, even though your furry friends have been part of the family for years.
8. The Mischief Maker
Usually your younger brother, he loves to stir the pot. He’ll make snide comments about your cooking, questioning whether you really used the right ingredients, especially in front of the vegan and the fitness fanatic.
9. The Stealth Eater
Last but not least, there’s the one who sneaks bites of pie when no one is looking. If you wake up to missing slices, you can bet it’s not the cat! If you try hiding the treats, just know that it might set off your house alarm—leaving you with more than just a missing dessert.
In the end, Thanksgiving is about family, and despite their quirks, I cherish my loved ones. I’m grateful to have them around the table and for the ability to share this meal together. So embrace your fitness fanatic, your mischief-maker, and even your stealth eater; they’re all part of your unique family tapestry.
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Summary:
Thanksgiving can bring a variety of challenging guests, from the health-conscious to the stealthy eaters. Understanding these personality types can help you navigate the holiday with grace, ensuring everyone enjoys the feast while keeping your sanity intact.