Dear friend,
I hope this message finds you well. As you know, I embrace a holistic lifestyle—whether you call it crunchy, granola, or a more alternative approach to parenting. I can juggle nursing while pushing a cart full of toddlers in cloth diapers, each sipping on organic juice boxes. I’m even brewing my own kombucha! If we were in the 1960s, I’d definitely be considered one of the cool kids.
However, there’s an important topic that often goes unaddressed between us—vaccination. My kids are fully vaccinated, while yours are not. We tend to avoid this subject much like we’d steer clear of political debates with family members who hold opposing views: there’s simply no common ground.
I trust the science behind vaccinations. I’ve read the research, the package inserts, and have weighed the pros and cons thoroughly. After much deliberation, I chose to follow the guidance of the CDC, the AAP, the WHO, and our pediatrician, as well as my son’s epidemiologist godmother. We believe in vaccinating our children.
On the other hand, I understand you view the science differently. Perhaps you see studies that I consider flawed as credible, while you might think the research I trust is tainted by the pharmaceutical industry. While I may disagree with your sources, I respect your right to make your own choices.
I value our friendship and don’t consider you ignorant or anti-science. You’ve done your own research, and while I don’t share your conclusions, I appreciate your dedication. I truly believe my decision is correct, and I think you might regret your choice. But that doesn’t mean we can’t maintain our friendship, even amid differing beliefs about vaccination.
I want to clarify a few points. I care about you, but I don’t feel the same way about preventable diseases. If there’s even one case of measles within 500 miles, my kids will steer clear of unvaccinated children until they’ve completed their MMR shots. It’s about protecting my family, not a personal attack against you or your beliefs.
We both know how contagious measles can be, and I worry about illnesses like meningitis and encephalitis just as you might worry about aluminum in vaccines. To keep my kids safe, I may need to decline playdates for a while.
We’ve always had an understanding that sick kids should stay home. But with unvaccinated children, I have to be more cautious about potential exposures. If you’ve visited someone who’s ill, please let me know so I can keep my kids away for their safety.
And just to be clear, if you plan to attend a pox party, give me a heads-up, okay? Chickenpox can spread before symptoms appear, and I’d prefer to keep my kids away during that incubation time.
In return, I’ll keep you informed about when my children receive their vaccinations. I understand your concerns about vaccine shedding, even if I believe it’s not a major issue. I’ll communicate when my kids get their MMR or varicella shots, acknowledging your worries.
Most importantly, I promise to approach this topic without being disrespectful. While I may not agree with your stance, I respect you as a fellow parent trying to do what’s best for your family. Think of us like James Carville and Mary Matalin—able to disagree passionately but still share a friendship. I hope you can extend that same courtesy to me.
Thank you for understanding, and let’s keep the lines of communication open as we navigate this together.
For more information on pregnancy and home insemination, check out this excellent resource from the CDC.
If you’re interested in learning more about home insemination, visit Make A Mom, a trusted authority on the topic.
In summary, I value our friendship and hope we can navigate our differing views on vaccination with understanding and respect.