As summer finally graces us with its warmth—along with the necessity of sunscreen—I’ve been frequenting some beloved pools in Boulder. Observing how other moms interact with their kids can be quite entertaining, though it might also reveal my own limited outings. Here are some of the distinct types of moms you might spot at the pool:
- The Regulars: This pool is essentially their territory, and you just haven’t realized it yet. They arrive in small packs, staking out the best sunny or shady spots with matching foldable chairs, coordinated snacks, and vibrant towels. They give you the side-eye if they don’t recognize you. There’s a strong sense of camaraderie among them that makes you feel a bit out of place with your frayed towels and chocolate-smudged little ones.
- The Nannies (or “Au Pairs” if you’re feeling posh): Often just as tired as any mom, these caregivers sometimes recite a scripted phrase to the kids in their charge. I overheard one explaining that she had a specific “script” to stop the children from misbehaving. However, her heart didn’t seem to be in it, and the little girl continued to push other kids off the ladder, turning the pool into a mini Lord of the Flies.
- The Fun Mom: Ah, the Fun Mom. She makes all of us look a little less impressive, and honestly, I’m not a fan. She’s the one who tickles her child going down the slide, lets them ride on her back even when it seems painful, and initiates games of tag where she genuinely tries to catch them. She’s the one who brings swim noodles, for goodness’ sake. Her kids exude a smugness that suggests they were destined for greatness in a past life.
- The Phone Moms: Some of us need to stay connected, but there are those who spend the majority of their time glued to their phones at the poolside. It’s impressive, really. Meanwhile, their kids are raiding other people’s snacks, using my child as a flotation device, and creating chaos while Phone Mom remains blissfully unaware.
- The Desperate Mom with a Toddler and Newborn: You’ll spot this mom with a sleeping baby by the pool’s edge while her toddler runs riot. She’s lucky if her swimsuit is even on correctly and her eyes reveal a hint of panic. We’ve all been there, and you might even catch her dozing off in the shallow end, jolted awake only when her toddler pokes her with a stray swim noodle.
- The Perfect Mom: Almost as grating as the Fun Mom, Perfect Mom has everything together. I often berate myself for not caring more about my appearance while watching her effortlessly flaunt her sculpted abs, flowy beach cover-up, and trendy sandals. Her kids look like they’ve just stepped out of a spa. Honestly, I’m at the pool partly to avoid bathing my kids!
- The Mom Searching for a Friend: I empathize with her. It’s like a casual dating scene. She notices that our kids are of similar ages and share a love for splashing around. Starting with “How old is she?” she strikes up a conversation. You exchange details about your children’s quirks, like how they both enjoy jumping off high places and being the slowest when it comes to getting into the car, all while trying to prevent them from poking each other’s eyes.
- The Hippie Mom: Recognizable by her homemade vegan snacks and children named Bringer of Light and Peaceful Spirit, the Hippie Mom radiates calm even as her kids are wrestling each other. Don’t be shocked if Light Bringer asks for a sip of milk from her at the poolside. My kid’s middle name is Rainbow, so I can’t judge too harshly.
- The Grandma: In Boulder, it can be tough to distinguish between grandmas and young moms, as many women have children later in life. These grandmas look fantastic in their two-pieces, and they genuinely enjoy spending time with the kids. You’ll often find them sharing high-fives and snacks, making them as delightful as Fun Mom.
- The Discipline Mom: She has a strict rulebook for her kids—no pushing, no skipping lines, and certainly no booger displays in the pool (her eyes darting toward my child). Though she means well, it often feels like too much pressure. Sometimes kids just want to splash their friends!
I’ve found myself fitting into all these categories at some point, depending on how much sleep I’ve managed to snag amidst the chaos at home. Well, all except for Perfect Mom. She must have some wild side hiding underneath that polished exterior.
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Summary:
This summer, you’ll encounter various types of moms at the pool, from the regulars and nannies to the fun and perfect moms. Each has their unique approach to parenting, making for a lively and diverse poolside atmosphere. Whether you’re looking for camaraderie or just enjoying the sun, the pool is a melting pot of mom personalities.