Thanksgiving is here again, and if you think you’ve seen it all, think again! This year, let’s explore the different types of Thanksgiving guests who are bound to test your patience. With the holiday just weeks away, you might already be fielding special requests: Lucy is allergic to gluten, Mark is on a strict paleo diet, and Aunt Sally insists on only organic ingredients.
You didn’t really believe that preparing for Thanksgiving would be as simple as just setting the table and roasting a turkey, did you? Not in this day and age! Here’s a fun guide to help you navigate the nine types of guests you may encounter this Thanksgiving.
- The Fitness Fanatic: This is likely your overly health-conscious cousin, who, as soon as she arrives, asks for a running route in the neighborhood. While you juggle cooking for a dozen people, she bombards you with questions: “Where did you get your turkey?” (Hint: “The grocery store” isn’t going to cut it.) “Are those sweet potatoes organic and free from pesticides?” Honestly, I’m just trying to make sure we have enough food!
- The Spectator: Often a mother-in-law (but not mine, of course), this guest prefers to watch rather than lend a hand in the kitchen. With an arsenal of unsolicited advice, she says things like, “Why don’t you put the kids in a playpen while you cook? That’s what I did.” Yes, because nothing says “Thanksgiving” like imprisoning children to get dinner on the table.
- The Animal Rights Advocate: Let’s face it; you probably have a vegan in your midst, possibly your teenage niece who has recently become passionate about animal welfare. Before Thanksgiving, her mother will call to inform you that all food must be completely free of animal products. Almond milk for the mashed potatoes? Sure, why not?
- The Party Animal: You know there’s always one, right? With a dozen guests, it’s highly likely you’ll have an “Uncle Jake” who can’t resist the allure of a cocktail. While you’re in the kitchen trying to keep everything on schedule, you glance over to see him tossing back drinks and launching your toddler into the air!
- The TMI Relative: We all have one—your chatty aunt who believes everyone wants to hear the details of her latest medical issues. You nod politely while she describes her sinus infection in graphic detail. Surely, there are less stomach-turning tales she could share, like her adventures in dating back in the day.
- The Sneak Eater: This is the guest who simply can’t wait for the feast. You might have a family member who starts picking at the food before it even hits the table. To combat this, you’ve resorted to preparing a decoy turkey, so he doesn’t completely demolish the real one before the meal.
- The Allergy Advocate: This is a tricky one. While allergies are serious, some guests come with a laundry list of requests. You might find yourself scrambling to find new bedding because “little Timmy is allergic to down feathers.” And don’t even think about letting your pets roam free!
- The Provocateur: Often a younger brother, this guest has a knack for stirring the pot. He’ll make offhand comments like, “Are you sure those mashed potatoes are vegan?” to get a rise out of the other guests, and suddenly, the dinner table is a battlefield of dietary debates.
- The Midnight Snacker: You may suspect that someone is sneaking bites of dessert while the rest of the family is asleep. If you wake up to find half the pies gone, you might want to hide them in the garage. Just be careful; if the midnight snacker realizes you’re onto their game, you could end up with a surprise visit from the police!
At the end of the day, Thanksgiving is about family, and despite the quirks of your guests, you truly appreciate the time spent together. Each of these characters brings their own flavor to the holiday, and that’s what makes it all worthwhile.
For more tips on family gatherings, be sure to check out our other posts on home insemination kits and pregnancy resources.
Summary
This article humorously outlines the various types of Thanksgiving guests that can drive you up the wall, from fitness fanatics to midnight snackers. While these characters can be challenging, they also enrich the holiday experience, reminding us to cherish family time.